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Band 4.5

Some people think that individuals today are more dependent on each other. Others believe people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #individuals
A clear, confident speaking voice is an essential life skill that fosters
self esteem
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self-esteem
show examples
 and personal confidence. It is widely argued that youngsters had better acquire giving speeches and make presentations while are
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 school curriculum.
This
 can be determined by several factors, but I believe that these
skills
 should
actively
Add a missing verb
be actively
show examples
 encouraged and developed in pupils by their schools. Clearly,one of the biggest barriers to the
students
 in life is a lack of good communication
skills
 .
To begin
 with, the introduction of these
skills
 to the youngest
students
 , allows them to meet the challenge associated with speaking publicly from an early age, instilling children with the increased confidence that leads to success.
Additionally
,by teaching
such
skills
 schools not only improve
pupils
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pupils'
pupil's
show examples
 oral communication but
also
 develop their creativity , smooth transitions,
right
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the right
show examples
 tone, and body language as well as eye contact which contribute to an effective presentation. Meanwhile ,we live in an age when
students
 and employees are
also
 judged on how well they communicate and present themselves at work and in public. Despite that
reality
Add a comma
,reality
show examples
 many
students
 leave school or university today with impressive  qualifications yet when it comes to the spoken word a great number (including myself) find themselves struggling to express themselves clearly and confidently.
Thus
 it will be beneficial for youngsters if elementary schools elevate speaking to the same level as reading and writing. In conclusion, the earlier children are taught how to give speeches and presentations, the earlier they gain confidence which
lead
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leads
show examples
 to success. Not only do these soft
skills
 impact
youngsters
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youngsters'
youngster's
show examples
 future success but
also
 promote constant improvements.
Submitted by world111197 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • interconnected
  • globalization
  • remote work
  • independence
  • dependency
  • specialization
  • professional services
  • social validation
  • individualism
  • self-reliance
  • collective action
  • sustainability
  • global community
  • navigating
  • complexity
  • environmental movement
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