IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Fossil fuel is the main source of engergy. In some countries, the use of alternatie sources of engergy is encouraged. Is this a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays, fossil fuel is the primary source of energy;
however
Linking Words
, it will run out in the future. To solve
this
Linking Words
 problem, in many
countries
Use synonyms
, particularly in developed
countries
Use synonyms
, governments encourage using alternative sources. In my opinion, it is a positive development.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
. First and foremost, alternating
resources
Use synonyms
 can prevent global warming. Because the majority of gas emissions are produced by manufacturers, which use fossil fuel as the main power.
For instance
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, many developing
countries
Use synonyms
, use gas, oil
or
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 so on to produce power.
As a result
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, the rate of gas emission is higher and higher. To be more specific, Vietnam is an example, the number of emissions from fossil fuels is always high and it causes air pollution. From that, if the companies used alternative
resources
Use synonyms
, the air might become cleaner.
In addition
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, using renewable sources not only
prevent
Correct subject-verb agreement
prevents
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 global issues but
also
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 prevents human issues, particularly in health. Many scientists research that toxic components are found in almost
fossil
Correct determiner usage
all fossil
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 fuels.
Consequently
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, citizens breathe it every day and may get
the
Correct article usage
apply
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health issues,
such
Linking Words
 as
cancers
Fix the agreement mistake
cancer
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 or respiratory diseases. To illustrate, many
labours
Correct your spelling
labourers
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 who are exposed to fossil fuels every day will be affected when they get old.
That is
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 why using alternative
resources
Use synonyms
 or renewable
resources
Use synonyms
 will protect both the Earth and humans. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 fossil fuel is the main energy, it will cause a variety of problems and empty out in the future. Many developed
countries
Use synonyms
 are encouraged to use
renewable
Correct your spelling
renewables
show examples
 to continue to develop in a sustainable way.

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task response
Task Response: The essay provides a relevant response to the task question, but it should focus on balancing the discussion of positive and negative aspects of using alternative energy sources.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a logical structure with clear introduction and conclusion, but there are some issues with linking words and sentence structure that affect the overall coherence and cohesion.
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