Students who are given grades work harder than those who do not. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

It is critically important that
students
work
as hard as possible when they are at school. Personally, I believe that teachers can motivate
students
to
work
hard by giving them
grades
. I feel
this
way
for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin
with,
students
who are graded achieve a lot of comprehensive knowledge of academic subjects. When a student has an opportunity to earn
grades
, he will spend more time working on his assignments and will
therefore
absorb more information and
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
achieve more comprehension.
On the other hand
,
students
who do not have to worry about their
grades
won’t
work
very hard and will only superficially understand their subjects. My own experience as a student is a compelling example of
this
. During my sophomore
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
Add a comma
,
show examples
I had to complete a major assignment in a political science
class
I was taking.
According to
the course syllabus, the assignment would make up about half of my total grade in the
class
, so I approached my
work
with diligence and care. I wrote an amazing speech and spent hours preparing for every possible question my classmates might think of. If the presentation had not been graded, I would not have spent so much time preparing for it. I am sure that
students
all over the world today are motivated to
work
hard by the chance to achieve high
grades
from their professors.
Secondly
,
grades
motivate
students
because they are a
way
to determine which people in a group are objectively
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
intelligent.
Grades
are assigned in a systematic
way
, so they clearly demonstrate which
students
in a
class
are the best and brightest.
For example
, in my
last
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
I took a literature
class
where
students
merely got a “pass” or “fail”
at the end
. Since only a moderate amount of effort was required to pass the
class
, I completed my assignments and presentations quite halfheartedly.
In contrast
, when I took a graded
class
on the same subject in my junior year, I spent hours in the library researching my papers so that I could show my professors that I was intellectually superior to my classmates.
This
may appear somewhat shallow, but in today’s competitive academic
environment
Add a comma
environment,
show examples
it is absolutely necessary for people to distinguish themselves. In conclusion, I strongly believe that
grades
encourage
students
to learn.
This
is because they force
students
to learn as much as possible and because they give young learners a
way
to distinguish themselves from their peers.
Submitted by ilirjana.sheta on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
You have effectively addressed the task by presenting a clear position on the topic and supporting it with specific reasons and examples. However, consider acknowledging the counterargument to show a balanced perspective.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is well-organized and ideas flow logically, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. You could use more linking words to show the relationship between ideas.
task response
Work on providing more depth in your examples. Detailed, specific examples strengthen your argument and make it more compelling to the reader.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively frame your argument.
task response
You use specific examples from your own experience to support your ideas, which makes your argument more convincing.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • tangible goals
  • measurable target
  • concrete sense of achievement
  • feedback mechanism
  • strengths and weaknesses
  • competition
  • incentive
  • outperform
  • scholarships
  • future opportunities
  • self-esteem
  • personal satisfaction
  • external pressure
  • societal expectations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: