Some people say that as long as professional sportsmen and sportswomen are good players, their behavior on and off the playing field is not important. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

There is no denying the fact that sportspeople have been influencing the
youth
since times immemorial. Youngsters take pride in imitating them, be it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
their sport, lifestyle or even their
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
, due to their achievements and the recognition they earn for their respective countries.
However
, sometimes these
sports-celebrities
Correct your spelling
sports celebrities
show examples
cross the line and portray the worst of their
demeanor
Change the spelling
demeanour
show examples
, which has raised concerns.
This
issue has split
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society into two opposing parts, one of which justifies the poor conduct by the players, while others despise it. I am in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
consummate accord with the later part
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and will justify it in the
further
fragments of
this
essay. To commence with the opinion of
people
who feel that the occasional portrayal of poor
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
is justifiable due to the constraint and competition of their aggressive fields, I beg to differ as no one is
Correct your spelling
indispensable
indispensible
Correct your spelling
indispensable
when it comes to common social conduct.
Although
I completely agree with the
ressureof
Correct your spelling
pressure of
continuous scrutiny these public figures have to face, it does not give them a right to act as per their convenience. Youngsters
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
almost all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries and communities seek these sportsmen and sportswomen as their role models, which makes it more crucial for these public figures to think twice before they do or say something. Digging deeper into my own viewpoint, any
misbehavior
Change the spelling
misbehaviour
show examples
or display of ill manners can disrupt the reputation of the famous
people
as well as may defame the industry as a whole, as it gives a bad impression on
youth
, for in case the celebrity they hero-worship is being verbally abusive or disrespectful towards the
people
around them. For an instance, if the video of any sportsperson gets viral on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
while using bad language or actions,
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
aspirants of that sport will be disheartened and may be forced to choose
otherwise
. To put my pen down it, I would like to completely disapprove
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
ill manners displayed by famous sports figures, despite their contribution in their respective fields, as they bear the responsibility of guiding the
youth
in the right direction.
However
, if they will not showcase any sign of moral
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
or
self control
Add a hyphen
self-control
show examples
, the
youth
might be doomed
taking
Change the verb form
to take
show examples
these
people
as their
hero
Fix the agreement mistake
heroes
show examples
.
Submitted by Toni R on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!