IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #museums #art #galleries #objects #works #computer
It is sometimes argued that museums and galleries are not necessary these days
due to
 easy accessibility on smart devices.
While
 I accept that everyone can see historical objects through computers, it would be wrong to say that these exhibitions are not needed. On the one hand, there are three major reasons why some people claim that these types of places are not needed these days.
Firstly
, digital platforms make art and historical objects more accessible to a global audience, creating more opportunities for those who don’t have a chance to visit physical exhibitions.
Secondly
, it is more cost-effective and convenient when accessing online, people can easily explore art and history at their homes.
Finally
, it can provide interactive experiences, allowing users to zoom in, zoom out, and offer detailed information.
On the other hand
, there are several reasons why I would argue that museums and galleries are important in these days and ages.
To begin
 with, they have cultural and historical significance, representing a tangible connection to the past.
For example
, Dragon House located in Ho Chi Minh City is a museum that connects with the period when Uncle Ho left Vietnam to find ways to save the nation.
Furthermore
, these spaces maintain a strong sense of continuity and an identity for a specific community.
Lastly
, these places provide educational value through guided tours and educational programs, and the immersive and interactive nature of exhibitions enhances the learning experience. In conclusion, I believe that
although
 everyone can access historical objects or artworks through digital devices, physical historical places and art galleries are still needed.
Submitted by miatr.work on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and transitions smoothly from one paragraph to the next, which would strengthen the logical flow.
task achievement
To enhance task achievement, expand your arguments with more specific and varied examples, and cover all facets of the question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • virtual
  • digital
  • online
  • accessibility
  • inclusivity
  • cultural heritage
  • physical experience
  • immersion
  • local tourism
  • economy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: