IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #meat #fish #health #world
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Meat consumption has been drastically reduced throughout the world. People believe that becoming a vegetarian or vegan could provide many
benefits
Use synonyms
 to them and to the entire earth as well. In my opinion, it has so much of
benefits
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
people and
entire
Add an article
the entire
show examples
 world.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
humans
Use synonyms
 who eat vegetarian items have enjoyed immense health
benefits
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
,
recent
Add an article
a recent
show examples
 study from an American university has
showed
Change the verb form
shown
show examples
 that when
humans
Use synonyms
 eat
Add a hyphen
plant-based
show examples
plant based
Add a hyphen
plant-based
show examples
 items have improved
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 health conditions and
less
Add a missing verb
are less
show examples
 prone to
Correct your spelling
diseases
dieases
Correct your spelling
diseases
.
Further
Linking Words
, they can live with
serene
Add an article
a serene
show examples
 mind and their sleeping conditions have improved a lot. One of the main reasons is that
human
Correct article usage
the human
show examples
 body is built to eat vegetarian foods even though many of them do not follow it.
Therefore
Linking Words
, vegetarian foods could give various advantages to
humans
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, when
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
show examples
Add a hyphen
plant-based
show examples
plant based
Add a hyphen
plant-based
show examples
 items are consumed worldwide, it could reduce the production of
Correct your spelling
livestock
livestocks
Correct your spelling
livestock
.
Hence
Linking Words
,
wastages
Fix the agreement mistake
wastage
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on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 water and land could be reduced significantly.
For instance
Linking Words
, to run a typical chicken farm,
Correct your spelling
average
avearge
Correct article usage
a avearge
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 of 20,000
liters
Change the spelling
litres
show examples
 of water
used
Add a missing verb
is used
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 on monthly basis ,
also
Linking Words
 acres of
lands
Fix the agreement mistake
land
show examples
 are used for beef farming.
Therefore
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,
this
Linking Words
 could help to develop an eco-friendly environment around the world.
Thus
Linking Words
,
Add a hyphen
plant-based
show examples
plant based
Add a hyphen
plant-based
show examples
 consumption could provide multiple advantages to entire living beings. In conclusion, It is true that less intake of meats or
fishes
Fix the agreement mistake
fish
show examples
 could help people by bringing many health
benefits
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to the earth as a whole. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
humans
Use synonyms
 are built
Linking Words
such
Change preposition
in such
show examples
 a way that they should not intake
meats
Fix the agreement mistake
meat
show examples
 and scarce resources could be saved by limiting animal farming.
Submitted by Jay_Practise on

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