More and more people today are moving away from where their friends and family live. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent years,an increasing number of

people

are migrating from their close ones.

While

this

trend offers multiple professional growth opportunities to them,

however

on the downside it leads to loneliness. I believe that the positive aspects take precedence over the drawbacks. On the one hand, one of the greatest benefits of working away from family and friends is growth in professional life.

This

is because living in a small town offers fewer opportunities in terms of jobs. Most of the companies are located in cities, which offer employees better salary packages and numerous other benefits.

As a result

, most

people

find

this

lucrative and they move away from their relatives in order to attain better living standards.

For instance

in India,

due to

the boom in the IT sector, the majority of inhabitants moved away from their native places in search of better employment.

Nevertheless

, there are a few drawbacks in terms of loneliness when it comes to staying apart from

Correct article usage

the

show examples

closest

people

This

due to

working

people

will find no one to share their feelings with. The

people

who are workmates are not that close-knit as compared to friends and family to share emotions.

Therefore

, sometimes it may lead to mental depression. To illustrate, a recent study concluded that working away from family and friends is the primary reason for depression. In conclusion,

although

there are a few disadvantages to staying away from loved ones,

they're

Correct your spelling

they are

show examples

myriad benefits which outweigh the negative aspects. In my opinion, moving away is a complex decision

also

, it plays a pivotal role in securing a better livelihood which makes the person happier and more successful in life.

Submitted by mehmetrustuaksoy103 on Mon Jul 25 2022

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction clearly addresses the topic to provide a solid foundation for the rest of the essay.

task achievement

Make sure to include specific examples to support each point, and ensure they are relevant to the discussion.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion should neatly summarize the main points and provide a clear answer to the essay question.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born. What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?”

people who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. what are the most significant of these problems? how can these problems be tackled?

‏Crime is becoming a serious concern. Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime. While others feel that little action can be done to stop crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The pie chart below shows the main reason why agriculutural land become less productive. The table shows how these causes effected three regions of the world during the 1900s