Many people are afraid to leave their home because of their fear of crime. Some people believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, but others | feel that little can be done. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #home #fear #crime #action

In our modern society

crime

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

becoming more and more dangerous because their behaviours are unable to control.

Therefore

the community do not want to leave home. As a matter of fact, Some people believe that the

government

should have activities to save citizens from these bad actions whereas others assert that

this

action is valueless. From my point of view, it absolutely needs feasible solutions to prevent

crime

from causing negative impacts

Change preposition

apply

show examples

on society. On the one hand, now

crime

is very popular in the world which affects directly the lives of private residents and general society. As a consequence, metropolitan are afraid of leaving home since

crime

is omnipresent.

Therefore

first

and foremost, the

government

should issue strict laws and punishment to warn the citizens having the wrong action.

Besides

, to reduce the number of crimes

government

should have positive education methods to improve behaviours.

For example

, at the moment the tendency to break the law is more various in the young generation because they are not taught and led to positive behaviours.

Moreover

, the

government

just have policies to support poor families so that they can improve their financial background, which can reduce the

crime

rate.

On the other hand

, in

4.0

Correct article usage

the 4.0

show examples

technology era, a wide range of valid solutions

issued

Add a missing verb

were issued

show examples

and applied all over the world, which made a considerable effort in reducing criminal proportion.

For instance

, a variety of nations are in every attempt to reduce their inflation rate which

resulting

Change the form of the verb

results

show examples

in a decrease in figures for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crime

. As an illustration, The authority creates some charitable organisations to help the poor or expand military protection as well as prevent smuggling rings

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and selling people.

As a result

, their resident has a better life standard which is more secure. In conclusion, from my point of view,

although

crime

still appears, the

government

will protect everyone from them effectively.

Submitted by phuongthao.3822 on Tue Jul 26 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

314 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many people are afraid to leave their home because of their fear of crime. Some people believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, but others | feel that little can be done. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Nowadays, many people commute by public transport in most big cities around the world. What are the reason for this? What can be done to improve public transport?

In many countries, tourism is a major part of the economy, but it also causes environmental damage and ruins the places it exploits. It is argued that tourists should pay an additional tax to compensate for this damage. Do you agree?

Getting promotions is one of the biggest drives for people to apply themselves and work hard in the modern workplace. Why do you think people are so driven to get promotion? What other factors influence people to work hard?