Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development

Nowadays, young

people

spend hours and days on their smartphones.

This

essay will discuss the reasons behind

this

and present evidence to support my view that it is an adverse development. Children are dangerous going out in the modern city and some places do not develop well and do not have interesting sites to attract young

people

. Because in some developing countries, there are too many factories in the city. The roads are not safe for kids.

For example

, in my hometown, there used to be three factories around the town and the air is polluted. There are many trucks on the road.

Hence

many residents just stayed at home and do not know what to do.

However

, my town did not have a park before. Especially the young kids, they just played with their phones. Using phones too much has a bad impact on the health of children. They will easily get myopia. According to recent research, more than half of young Chinese

people

got myopia. After a long time staying with the phone individuals become weaker. Because they lack physical exercise. Young

people

are easier to get

obesity

Replace the word

obese

show examples

than before. Children become overfat very common at primary school now in China.

For instance

, I found that my friends both have myopia and obesity and we do like playing games on our smartphones. In conclusion, Spending too much time on the phone influenced our health. Some cities are dangerous we do not have a choice but stay inside. But We should teach the kids to avoid using it over time. we

Submitted by a121107465 on Wed Jul 27 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think reading stories in books is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Many people say that we now live in ‘consumer societies’ where money and possessions are given too much importance. Others believe that consumer culture has played a vital role in improving our lives. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Today’s schools should teach their students how to survive financially in the world today. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?