Recent advances in medical science have resulted in increased life expectancy over the past few years. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#advances #science #life #expectancy #years

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As a result

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of the development in technology and medical science,

people

Use synonyms

now can have a longer lifespan than before.

Although

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it seems to be a great consequence and will have a lot of positive effects, it

also

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has some drawbacks that we need to know about. On the one hand, if we can live longer, we can spend more

time

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with our families and someone we love.

Furthermore

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, we will have more

time

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to accomplish our dreams and do something we want to do.

For instance

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, if we live 10 years longer than others, we will have an abundance of

time

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to enjoy our lives and try a variety of activities that we have never done before. For me, I would like to travel around the world or have a long-term trip to a specific country.

On the other hand

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, it is believed that if life expectancy increases, medical costs will grow significantly, which means

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

have to tax

people

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more to deal with the financial burden.

Moreover

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, since old

people

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have less ability to earn money, the younger generations will have to pay directly or indirectly to their parents. Take Taiwan

for example

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. In recent years, Taiwan has become an ageing society, partly because

people

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have been less willing to give birth to children because they have to spend a lot of

time

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and money on their elderly parents.

Therefore

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, the birth rate is decreasing year by year. In conclusion, as far as I am concerned, I believe that the disadvantages of increasing life expectancy outweigh their advantages. I don’t think I can make any positive contributions to

this

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society when I am 80 years old. If I could decide the length of my life, I would not want to reach the age of 90, because I

will

Wrong verb form

would

show examples

probably have some troubles with my health and be unable to move freely at that

time

Use synonyms

Submitted by wanyc90 on Sat Jul 30 2022

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coherence cohesion

Improve the introduction and conclusion to provide a more comprehensive overview of the essay. Ensure that the main points are clearly supported and developed throughout the response.

task achievement

Focus on providing a more complete response that fully addresses the question. Develop the main ideas more clearly and use specific examples to support the arguments effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

316 words

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Recent advances in medical science have resulted in increased life expectancy over the past few years. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Your opinion

The government should control the internet to reduce cybercrime and ensure safety of users. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

Some cultures value elderly people more while other cultures value the youth more . Discuss both approaches and give your own opinion.

With a growing worls population one of the most pressing issues is that of feeding such large number of people. Some people think that GM foods offer a viable solution to this problem. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that schools should reward students who show the best academic results, while others believe that it is more important to reward students who show improvements. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?