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Band 4

Fewer and fewer peoplewalk on a daily basis. What are the reasons and how to encourage them to spend their time

#peoplewalk #basis #time
It is certainly true that the importance of walking
are
Change the verb form
is
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 decreasing day by day
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, therefore,
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therefore
a
Correct article usage
apply
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very few
people
 are interested in walking. It can
causes
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cause
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detrimental
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a detrimental
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effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
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 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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health. It is a serious health issue it must be addressed immediately. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
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 the causes and the possible necessary steps to solve the issue will be discussed. On the one hand, there are several possible causes behind
this
.
Firstly
 in
this
past
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fast
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 paced
society
Add a comma
,society
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 most
people
 are facing a serious concern
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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lack of time. Many individuals are running a rat race competition in their
Correct your spelling
work
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wok
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work
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 and life so do not get enough time for
walk
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a walk
the walk
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.
Secondly
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,Secondly
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 because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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urbanisation a plethora of private vehicles are available in our society. One advantage
Correct your spelling
of
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pf
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of
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 private transportation is very convenient and
time saving
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time-saving
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.Due to
this
people
 always use
private
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a private
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vehicle
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vehicles
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instead
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of
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od
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of
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 walking.
On the other hand
,there are several ways in which the problem can be solved. Begin with,public education is a necessary step that can create more awareness about the benefits of walking on
people
. To illustrate
through
Change preposition
apply
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classes ,seminars and social media explain the tremendous advantages of walking to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
Next
, with the help of modern technologies like
tread
Correct your spelling
treadmills
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mills
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,mills
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 we can encourage the habit of walking. To conclude, in today's world more and more
people
 are fascinated
on
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with
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 the passive
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lifestyle
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life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
however
 it can cause dramatic health issues.
Although
 few timely steps can reduce the severity of the
Correct your spelling
issue
isssue
Correct your spelling
issue
.
Submitted by nairrohith719 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • automation
  • public transportation
  • urban planning
  • pedestrian-friendly
  • safety concerns
  • pedestrian zones
  • public health campaigns
  • incentives
  • commuting
  • walkathons
  • physical and mental health
What to do next:
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