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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people prefer to go to health clubs and gyms for health care, some say the walking and climbing stairs are more effective. Discuss both vies and give your opinion.

#people #health #clubs #gyms #care #say #stairs
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Health
Use synonyms
 care is an important major . Some people say that they must go to a sports
club
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 or a
gym
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 for improving their
health
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. While others say that walking or climbing is more effective than going to a
club
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. I think that going to the
gym
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 is more effective than walking or running. There are many reasons for
this
Linking Words
.
Firstly
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 when you walk you
train
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 your leg
muscles
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 only while the other
muscles
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 do not get training. To have good
health
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 you must
train
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 most of your
muscles
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. So a professional sports
club
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 will play a major role to
train
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 most of your
muscles
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 and make you healthy. For ,example there are many machines in the
gym
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 to
train
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 your
muscles
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. One other thing is there is a professional trainer in most of the gyms and he gives you the correct way to improve your
health
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.
In addition
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 to
this
Linking Words
, When you pay membership in a
gym
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 you will probably go to it frequently since you do not want to lose your money. But when it comes to regular walking you may not go frequently since you do not pay for it.
this
Linking Words
 plays a big role as well to improve your
health
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. To conclude, We must do exercises to improve our
health
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 and make us more healthy. Some people say going to a sports
club
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 or a
gym
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 is more effective than going
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a walk or climbing the stairs. While others say going for a walk is more effective than I believe that going to the
gym
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 is more effective but everyone may choose the way he or she is comfortable .
Submitted by mustafa_dervis on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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