IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Advanced medical treatments are generally expensive.People's access to proper health care should not depend upon their level of income.All people have the right to access the best medicine available. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Nowadays, more and more
people
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 are suffering from sickness and do not get the
right
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treatment
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 due to expensive
treatment
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 costs. Individuals should have
access
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 to proper medicines and it should not depend on their level of income. I strongly agree with
this
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 statement and I think that every person has the
right
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 to
access
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 proper
treatment
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 without any concern for their property. I will explain my reasons for it in the upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, due to advanced in technology medical tools are coming expensive rate, and
as a result
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, treatments are more expensive and it is not possible for low-income
people
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 to afford that medicines and treatments.
However
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, I think that it is the government's responsibility to take action on that problems and give proper solutions to individuals' life to
access
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 the
right
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treatment
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.
Also
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, doctors should not create caste differences during checkups for any patient,
this
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 is because every person has their own appropriate to get free
access
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 to medical treatments from government hospitals and doctors.
Moreover
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,basically, low-level
people
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 are suffering from many diseases due to living in poor and poverty conditions.
For example
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, In Africa, more than 50% of the population live in slum areas and do not get proper
treatment
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 for their problem, so it is the authority's responsibility to take care of those communities.
On the other hand
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, the public has their own
right
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 to get the standard medical cure, which means that authorities should take action on their medical bills. The Authority should give
access
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 to
people
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 to get better
treatment
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.
For example
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, Delhi, one of the cities in India allows free standard medical facilities for their citizens, which helps them to prevent dangerous diseases like tuberculosis.
Also
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, authorities should invest more in medical sectors same as other sectors like education and science, which helps
people
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 to get the
right
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 and better cure for their illness. In conclusion, every individual has the
right
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 to get better and standard
treatment
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 for their problem.
However
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, the governments should free medical services to the public like the Delhi government to prevent and save their
people
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 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
harmful maladies.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Universal health coverage
  • Subsidies
  • Socioeconomic status
  • Disparity
  • Fundamental right
  • Resource allocation
  • Preventative care
  • Health equity
  • National health insurance
  • Research and development
  • Access to healthcare
  • Healthcare infrastructure
  • Cost-effective
  • Financial burden
  • Global health initiatives
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