IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#governments #progress #people #country
Nowadays some young people are required to
volunteer
 when they have a free hour to help the community. In my opinion,
although
 it can bring some benefits it causes negative on teenagers. On the one hand , I
agree
Add the particle
toagree
show examples
 do
volunteer
 can help teenagers to learn how to cooperate with others.
For example
, some students work together to clean up the roads during their free
time
 they need to distinguish the roads by part and each of them is responsible for cleaning up their own part so they can finish cleaning faster through cooperation. So some people think that it is necessary for juveniles doing
volunteer
 during their free
time
.
However
, it may cause some problems.
On the other hand
, I think that it is unnecessary to require youngsters to
volunteer
 during their free
time
. Because the pressure that comes from
school
 or cram
school
 is huge. For students, go to
school
 just like a full-
time
 job they need to finish numerous homework which comes from their teachers
in addition
 some of them even need to go to cram
school
 to learn some talents. So if we require the teen to
volunteer
 it will reduce their relaxation
time
 of them , which may have negative impacts on their development and study at
school
. To summarize
although
volunteer
 can teach young people how to work as a team it reduces the free
time
 of the teenagers who have to finish their
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 after
school
 it will cause too much pressure which they cannot endure.
Submitted by sinpaulpaul1234567890 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • sustainable development
  • social equality
  • environmental degradation
  • cultural heritage
  • technological innovation
  • wealth disparity
  • human development index
  • holistic approach
  • quality of life
  • economic prosperity
  • healthcare system
  • education system
  • cultural diversity
  • policy decisions
What to do next:
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