IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

#people #sites #facebook #impact #individuals #society
Social networking sites, for ,instance
Facebook
, are thought by some to have had a detrimental effect on individual
people
 as well as society and local associations.
However
, while I believe that
such
 grounds are mainly beneficial to the individual, I agree that they have had a damaging effect on local
communities
. With regards to individuals, the impact that online social media has had on each individual person has clear advantages.
Firstly
,
people
 from different countries are brought together through
such
 sites as
Facebook
 whereas ,before the development of technology and social networking grounds, society rarely had the chance to meet or communicate with anyone outside of their immediate circle or association.
Secondly
,
Facebook
also
 has social groups which offer individuals a chance to meet and participate in discussions with
Add an article
a group
the group
show examples
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 who share common interests.
On the other hand
, the consequence that
Facebook
 and other social networking sites have had on societies and local associations can only be seen as negative. Rather than individual
people
 taking part in their local association, they are
instead
 choosing to take more interest in
people
 online.
Consequently
, the community within local
communities
 is no longer forming close or supportive relationships.
Furthermore
, the community as a whole is becoming increasingly disjointed and fragmented as
people
 spend more time online with
people
 they have never met face to face and whom they are unlikely to ever meet in the future. To conclude,
although
 social networking grounds have brought individuals closer together, they have not had the same effect on society or local
communities
. Local
communities
 should do more to try and involve local
people
 in local activities in order to promote the future of community life.
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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • erosion
  • face-to-face
  • interactions
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • misinformation
  • polarize
  • cyberbullying
  • online harassment
  • procrastination
  • productivity
  • social isolation
  • dissemination
  • breeding ground
  • vast amounts
  • personal information
  • mental health
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