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Writing Samples
Band 6

With the growing population in cities, more and more people live in homes with small or no outdoor areas. Is it a positive or negative development?

#population #cities #people #homes #areas #development
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There is a growing trend in urban
areas
 that
people
 are living in accommodations with small or no outdoor spaces. The growing population and poverty are two prominent reasons for
this
 phenomenon. In my opinion, it is a negative trend because it causes many health-related problems.
This
 discourse will discuss the reasons and
further
 elucidate my assertions in the forthcoming paragraphs. Analyzing the statement and explaining it
further
, the
first
 and foremost important reason to live in small places is the growing population. These days, more and more
people
 are moving toward the urban
areas
 from villages which increases the demand for more
houses
. To
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
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this
 demand
people
 start splitting
houses
 and make snake congested apartments.
Moreover
, the demand for more
houses
 leads to increases in the prices of proper accommodations.
Correct your spelling
Therefore
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Therefor
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Therefore
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 poor
people
 can not afford to live in better
houses
.
For instance
, In Karachi, the vast majority of
people
 are coming from rural
areas
 of Pakistan.
This
 makes it a very dirty and populated city in the world.
People
 have no option other than living in cramped spaces.m In
this
 way, poverty, and less affordability become the
second
 largest reason for living in these kinds of
house
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houses
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. Probing ahead, living in congested places causes many health problems.
Firstly
, obesity is one of the biggest issues because
people
 have no or very less for physical exercise.
Correct your spelling
Secondly
Second
Secondl
Correct your spelling
Secondly
, another problem in these small
houses
 is depression as
people
 have no chance for outdoor activities.
For example
, in the congested area in Newyork,
people
 are 20% more stressful and than in other
areas
 of the city. The lack of air fluency indoors can cause respiratory-related disease and undermine working efficiency. To conclude, according to the arguments aforementioned above, one can conclude that poverty and increasing population are the main reason for
Correct your spelling
people
peopl
Correct your spelling
people
 to live in places with one or fewer outdoor
areas
 which cause health and mental problems
such
 as obesity, respiratory-related illnesses, and depression.
Submitted by bushra_rahman93 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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