With the growing population in cities, more and more people live in homes with small or no outdoor areas. Is it a positive or negative development?

#population #cities #people #homes #areas #development

There is a growing trend in urban

areas

that

people

are living in accommodations with small or no outdoor spaces. The growing population and poverty are two prominent reasons for

this

phenomenon. In my opinion, it is a negative trend because it causes many health-related problems.

This

discourse will discuss the reasons and

further

elucidate my assertions in the forthcoming paragraphs. Analyzing the statement and explaining it

further

, the

first

and foremost important reason to live in small places is the growing population. These days, more and more

people

are moving toward the urban

areas

from villages which increases the demand for more

houses

. To

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

this

demand

people

start splitting

houses

and make snake congested apartments.

Moreover

, the demand for more

houses

leads to increases in the prices of proper accommodations.

Correct your spelling

Therefore

show examples

Therefor

Correct your spelling

Therefore

show examples

poor

people

can not afford to live in better

houses

For instance

, In Karachi, the vast majority of

people

are coming from rural

areas

of Pakistan.

This

makes it a very dirty and populated city in the world.

People

have no option other than living in cramped spaces.m In

this

way, poverty, and less affordability become the

second

largest reason for living in these kinds of

house

Fix the agreement mistake

houses

show examples

. Probing ahead, living in congested places causes many health problems.

Firstly

, obesity is one of the biggest issues because

people

have no or very less for physical exercise.

Correct your spelling

Secondly

Second

Secondl

Correct your spelling

Secondly

, another problem in these small

houses

is depression as

people

have no chance for outdoor activities.

For example

, in the congested area in Newyork,

people

are 20% more stressful and than in other

areas

of the city. The lack of air fluency indoors can cause respiratory-related disease and undermine working efficiency. To conclude, according to the arguments aforementioned above, one can conclude that poverty and increasing population are the main reason for

Correct your spelling

people

peopl

Correct your spelling

people

to live in places with one or fewer outdoor

areas

which cause health and mental problems

such

as obesity, respiratory-related illnesses, and depression.

Submitted by bushra_rahman93 on Fri Aug 19 2022

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

325 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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With the growing population in cities, more and more people live in homes with small or no outdoor areas. Is it a positive or negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree?

With the increasing use and development of new technology, many machines are now able to do the work which people used to perform. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Computers and modems have made it possible for office workers to do much of their works from home instead of working in offices every day. Working from home should be encouraged as it is good for workers and employees. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Nowadays people use bicycles less as a form of transport. Why is this case? What can we do to encourage people to use bicycles more? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.