Advertising are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development?

#life #development

Many people hold a view that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

advertisements are more and more popular in everyday life. From my

Correct your spelling

perspective

perpective

Correct your spelling

perspective

this

tendency is totally negative. The

first

reason why I believe that matter

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

nagtive

Correct your spelling

negative

faces is that it

distract

Change the verb form

distracts

show examples

our time.

This

means

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

many

Correct word choice

that many

show examples

people search on Youtube for watching their necessary information, but a lot

advertising

Change preposition

of advertising

show examples

online wastes their time and with

others

Add a comma

,others

show examples

distractes

Correct your spelling

distracted

distracts

distract

them

Change preposition

from

show examples

their work.

For example

, many

entertain

Replace the word

entertainment

show examples

channels earn money from advertising that

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

more chance approach to more viewers than channels have well-knowledge without sponsors.

This

act will decrease the

inllectual

Correct your spelling

intellectual

levels of the social. Another reason why I believe

this

tendency is detrimental is that many shopping

advertising

Replace the word

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

promote
economic growth
provide information
awareness
job opportunities
manipulative
misleading
consumerism
materialism
invade
personal space

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Nowaways, more teenagers want to become famous actors or singers. Why do you think this is happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people feel that equality between the genders has already been achieved while others feel there is considerable progress to be made. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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