Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree
There is the idea that
music
has the power to unite people
from diverse cultures
and ages, and I completely support this
notion for a range of reasons.
Music
is very essential for cultures
around the world because it part
of their daily lives. Add a missing verb
is part
People
across multiple cultures
use music
in their various celebrations, such
as funerals, naming
ceremonies. Weddings, puberty rites, initiation ceremonies, Correct word choice
and naming
national
and community festivals. Traditional songs are sung among Correct word choice
and national
individuals
from the same cultures
and they enjoy it much because the lyrics are clear and understandable to them. It is part
of their identity, and therefore
do their best not to compose songs that will invoke hatred, tribalism and division. Traditional music
portrays the history of a country and the rich cultural practices that their ancestors have initiated throughout their live
time. They cherish Replace the word
life
this
valuable inheritance and preserve it.
But then
the question arise
, how does Change the verb form
arises
music
gather people
of different nationalities and ages worldwide? To start with, globalisation has contributed enormously to this
development. Nowadays individuals
from many countries have learnt embrace
cultural diversity of which Fix the infinitive
to embrace
music
forms part
. Music
is produced in one nationality and sold globally. People
want to listen to something different. This
cultural appreciation has united groups of nations. There is a sense of belonginess
when you hear someone Correct your spelling
belongingness
belonging
another
country singing your local songs, how beautiful! Change preposition
from another
Music
has the power of promoting peace among individuals
and nations. For example
, when there is a war in one part
of the world, musicians worldwide come together irrespective of their political background to compose music
that can curb the tension. It can unite people
also
through national sporting events such
as the Olympics games where individuals
put aside their wrath and cheer when national anthems from other parts of the world are sang
. Wrong verb form
sung
Music
is a powerful tool that helps humanity of all ages to correct their mistakes.
In conclusion, people
of diverse cultures
are connected by music
globally during
many occasions without considering their political affiliation or backgroundChange preposition
on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite