Many People think that fast food companies should not be allowed to advertise while other believe that all companies should have the right to advertise what is your opinion?
Getting a place in the market for a businessman, whatever the products are, is a vital action. Most of the buyers have an opinion that
the
junk Correct article usage
apply
food
sellers should not be permitted to commercialize their items, meanwhile, the rest of them persuade
to give freedom to Wrong verb form
are persuaded
fast
Correct article usage
the fast
food
vendors community in advertising their menu either by digital media or print media. I do agree with the latter suggestion. In the further
essay, how to have permission for every company to market their things is considerable rather than impose restrictions, will be discussed.
Firstly
, the eye-catching pictures of food
attract buyers, whenever they watch them on television commercials, billboards as well as
magazines. Some people think that this
creates an urge in food
lovers to buy them and eat along
with soft drinks, which is the reason for increasing obesity in public, especially in youth, but can be decreased by controlling their wishes. Correct pronoun usage
them along
If
exemplified, Correct word choice
As
according to
a survey in America 50% of young people are fat due to
eating unhealthy. Hence
, captivating animations of burgers are always a successful way of attracting gourmets.
Another group of customers has an opposite viewpoint that advertising is the key to success in any kind of company. Additionally
, there are thousands of methods to send their messages by clicking and tempting images of bakery objects, which can be used freely, such
as covert advertising and celebrity endorsement. For example
, McDonald's spends 500 million dollars on worldwide sponsorship, showed
in an article. None of the laws has been made by the judiciary to stop any of the businesses from publicizing.
Wrong verb form
as shown
To conclude
, I believe that, the more will be broadcasting
, the more would be the sale. Wrong verb form
broadcasted
Although
, the obese population can be the reason for many other circumstancesSubmitted by saba.tassadaq263 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
The essay addresses the prompt and presents clear arguments. Ensure to provide a balanced viewpoint and support ideas with more relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
The introduction lacks a clear thesis statement, and there is a need for better organization of ideas. Use transition words and phrases to improve coherence and cohesion.