Some people say that young people should be encouraged to leave home when they become adults while others claim it would be better to remain with their family. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #home #adults

It is frequently argued by a number of human beings that adolescents should be inspired for leaving their house when they become mature whereas others think that it would be better to live with their family always.

However

this

essay will try to describe both points of view with my vision too. On the one hand, it would be great to live alone from a certain age because it can be beneficial in several ways.

Firstly

, people can understand the significance of their close ones when they will start to stay lonely.

As a result

, they will learn to give priority to their relationships.

Secondly

, they can be self-dependent by learning various kinds of skills that they mightn't learn in the surroundings of their parents.

For instance

, they will gain knowledge about cooking, washing, buying things from the market, paying bills, time management and so on.

Moreover

, they can explore the world which can broaden their horizon.

In addition

, by facing ups and downs due to living alone in life, they will learn to make decisions.

For example

, whenever they will feel confused in a number of situations, they can immediately understand what should they do.

Furthermore

, they will know the differences between right and wrong.

On the other hand

, though staying alone can be advantageous to some extent, it can be more disadvantageous in a lot of environments.

For example

, sometimes men can face mental disorders like depression, especially when they had to face failure in their

first

initiative. Again, the family can keep a person strong by standing with him always. Recent research has proved that people who always stay with their family are more successful in their life as they can share their happiness, sadness, anger etc with their close ones which is helpful for their refreshment as well as these can be beneficial in their workplace too as

this

freshness can boost their work speed. In conclusion, I think, family is more important than any other thing in the world.

Consequently

, it is better to remain with family rather than living them.

Submitted by Rubel Miah on Thu Aug 25 2022

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

346 words

8.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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