THERE ARE SOME MOTIVES FOR PEOPLE TO DO WORK.SOME PEOPLE THINK MONEY IS THE MOST IMPORTANT. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE.

The number of individuals is increasing day by day who is in mind that money is the most crucial factor in the world .In my point of view, it is out of question earning is essential ,

however

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,it has side effects as well. l will try to explain the reasons why am biased in

this

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statement. On the one hand ,with the assistance of ,

this

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we can work out our issues and overcome some obstacles in life.

For example

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, my friend wanted to get an education in England,

however

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, her family couldn't provide enough money for it ,due to she is not the only member of the family ,apart from these other expenditures made barriers.

Consequently

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, a lack of salary did not allow a few people to realise their dreams.

Moreover

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, they halt working on

in particular

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project any more.

On the other hand

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, half of the world's population wastes finance in every useless sector as they enjoy doing

this

Linking Words

For instance

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, some consumers buy expensive cars and are eager to wear clothes by famous designers so it turns their habits. Certainly, humans arrange to implement their goals by pampering themselves .

Furthermore

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, while using it carelessly, and losing control of themselves ,they spoiled their children and family members. In conclusion, most people who are thinking about money making the world round are rising dramatically. In my opinion , if we give a hand to one another in some difficult situation and try to keep the balance for dispersing

this

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scenery ,everything will be more appealing on

this

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changing earth.

unalhuseynli2

Aug 28, 2022

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

263 words

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THERE ARE SOME MOTIVES FOR PEOPLE TO DO WORK.SOME PEOPLE THINK MONEY IS THE MOST IMPORTANT. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE.

Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?