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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Very few schoolchildren learn about the value of money and how to look after it, yet this is a critical life skill that should be taught as part of the school curriculum. Do you agree or disagree?

#schoolchildren #value #money #life #skill #part #school #curriculum
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It is fact that making
money
 is very easy as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
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 to how to use or invest it.
Money
 management is
the
Correct article usage
a
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 significant skill that everyone should learn about
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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Correct your spelling
whether
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weather
Correct your spelling
whether
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 it is in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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schools, colleges or universities. So personally, I am in the favour of
this
 statement that it should be a part of their study, in
the
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apply
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school as a major subject.
First
 and the foremost reason is the inflation rate. It has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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increased from 2.5 to 7.5 Per cent
from
Change preposition
in
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last
Correct article usage
the last
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 five years. Not only
this
,
the
Correct word choice
but the
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 prices of basic
grocery
Fix the agreement mistake
groceries
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 and fuel
also
 climbed drastically in past few years.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
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 means,
people
Correct word choice
that people
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 who don’t know how to invest their
money
 in different public sectors,
they
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apply
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are unable to grow
in
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apply
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their whole life. Let’s take an example of a famous
Correct your spelling
businessman
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business man
Correct your spelling
businessman
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 name Mukesh Ambani, who started his investment journey in 1980 with only 200 rupees. And right now he is
a
Correct article usage
the
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 world’s
third
 richest man.
That is
 called
power
Add an article
the power
a power
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 of
money
 management and investment.
In addition
 to that , if kids will have
this
 subject in their studies they will understand the value of
money
 and
able
Add a missing verb
be able
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 to create their own assets and liabilities
in
Change preposition
at
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 younger age.
Moreover
, they will earn how they can make
money
 by putting their wealth on assets like properties and shares.
Nevertheless
, they should teach
by
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apply
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their teachers the famous quote from the book “Rich dad and poor dad” which said “ I don’t want to work for
money
,
money
 will work for me. In conclusion, according to me, having
a
Remove the article
apply
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subject management of
money
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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schools and colleges makes our kids more reliable and efficient.
Submitted by Anshloach187 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial literacy
  • curriculum
  • fiscal responsibility
  • money management
  • budgeting
  • saving
  • investing
  • adult population
  • financial decisions
  • educational systems
  • theoretical curriculum
  • practical life skills
  • real-life experience
What to do next:
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