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Band 5

Taking a year of between finishing school and starting university is a waste of students' time. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#year #school #university #waste #students #time
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While the most important things about being a
student
Use synonyms
 are learning as much knowledge as we can, and avoiding taking too many breaks.
Nevertheless
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, there are still some things that we can do to enrich our
student
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 life. In my opinion, I completely disagree that taking a
gap
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year
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 before we become a freshman is wasting
time
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. With the identity of
students
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, It is very common to go to
college
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 immediately after graduating from high school, taking more advanced classes than in high school, and learning more expertise with an eye to acquiring a degree of bachelor.
First
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 of all, the reason why
students
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 should go to
college
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 is to have more challenging courses, which
also
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 needs
students
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 to spend more
time
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 on them.
Secondly
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, taking a
gap
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year
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 will cause
students
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 to lose their memory of some know-how, decreasing their academic performance as the
college
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student
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's goal always is graduating from university.
Last
Linking Words
 but not least, there
are
Change the verb form
is
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 some
possibility
Fix the agreement mistake
possibilities
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 of
students
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 doing nothing, just wasting
time
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 while taking a
gap
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year
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.
Thus
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, having a long vacation before getting into
college
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 is not encouraged. Despite the problem mentioned above, there are still some advantages of a
gap
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year
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 that should be taken into consideration.
To begin
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 with, rather than learning expertise in
college
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, there are still many things that are very crucial and
college
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 can not cover.
For instance
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, the experience of working or the skill of conversing with people.
Secondly
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, taking a
year
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gap
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 help
students
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 find their hobbies and develop another skill they
Add a missing verb
are interest
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interest
Wrong verb form
interested
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 in but have no
time
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 to give a shot.
Finally
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, having a
gap
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year
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 to travel around the world or do working holidays not only gives
students
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 a more colourful life but
broaden
Correct subject-verb agreement
broadens
show examples
 their horizons, which are worth trying.
Although
Linking Words
 it is vital for
students
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 gets into university as soon as possible, if
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student
Add an article
a student
the student
show examples
 uses their
time
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 properly, the benefit of taking a
gap
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year
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 is tremendous, and every
student
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 can try and enrich their life.
Submitted by chuang089 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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