Eating too much sugar is harmful for our health. Some people think it is government responsibility to limit people's sugar consumption, while others think it is an individual's responsibility to limit the amount of suger they eat. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There is an agreement that consuming too much
sugar
might cause health issues. Many would argue that governments should step up and start to control the amount of sweet products in people's diets. On the other side of the argument is the opinion, that it is individual's
responsibility. Correct article usage
an individual's
This
essay will present an overview of the
both views and provide my own vision.
Remove the article
apply
Firstly
, government
might help in fighting increasing Add an article
the government
sugar
consumption, as they have the resources to educate citizens and add regulations to the food market. In addition
, there are softer ways that could be used, such
as educational programs, events to promote a healthy lifestyle, creating a law to mark products with correct
list of nutritions or adding a mandatory warning about the amount of Add an article
the correct
a correct
sugar
to the packaging.
On the other hand
, individuals could understand and know their needs better. Also
, healthy
diet, in general, is a choice, and nobody can force a person to follow a diet. Correct article usage
a healthy
As a result
, government's
pressure could face some kind of rebellion and people would hate new forced rules.
In my opinion, there is no need to add any strict regulations to sweet food consumption, as it is a personal choice. I would say, that adding labels which will indicate how healthy the product is could be a great first step. As an example, the European Union already has a similar system, where each product has a "healthy rating" from A to D to show the consumer how Correct article usage
the government's
this
product can affect their health.
In conclusion, government
and individuals should participate in solving the Correct article usage
the government
sugar
consumption epidemic together. There is no need for drastic changes, new taxes, and radical actions, but both groups can make some small steps towards common better health.Submitted by totora246 on
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task achievement
While the essay effectively addresses both viewpoints, providing more concrete examples in support of each perspective can strengthen the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The cohesion between the paragraphs is good, but pay attention to connecting ideas more fluidly with transitional phrases.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that the introduction clearly outlines your position or the plan of the essay to guide the reader more explicitly.
introduction
The introduction effectively sets up the context of the discussion and clearly states both sides of the argument.
logical structure
The main points are clearly presented and easy to follow, demonstrating a good level of coherence.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the key arguments and reaffirms the author's position.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.