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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many countries aim to improve their living standard by economic development, but some important social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages? .

#countries #aim #development #values
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In the modern world, with the development of technology and the economy, living standards have become more and more suitable.
However
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, some
people
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 argue that these improvements have detrimental effects on social values. I believe that the advantages of
this
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 outweigh the disadvantages.
To begin
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 with, economic improvement plays an important role
for
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in
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 a
country
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.
In other words
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, it
does
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not only provide better health and education for
people
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,
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apply
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 but
also
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 increases the way
people
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 live through these improvements.
For instance
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, if a
country
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 has a strong economy, it could provide better health services in hospitals without giving money and educate in well-developed universities.
Moreover
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,
people
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 who live in a
country
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 with a higher living standard do not spend a lot of
time
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 seeking a job compared to
people
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 who live in
poor
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a poor
the poor
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Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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.
Thus
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, these citizens find easily
a
Correct article usage
apply
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well paid
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well-paid
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 jobs and may spend more
time
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 with their families.
On the other hand
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,
people
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's social life could be affected by economic development. Because
people
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 are social creatures they need to communicate with each other.
However
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, technological-focused life might make
people
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 less interactive with others.
For example
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, most
people
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 tend to meet with their friends in cafes or malls, but
this
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 could be changed with economic developments by increasing social media platforms like Instagram and Facebook. These kinds of sites are increasing and it is more suitable for
people
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 ,especially for the youngers.
However
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,
this
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 problem could be tackled by encouraging
people
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 to go outside and spend
time
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 with their friends and family. In conclusion,
although
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 there are some downsides of increasing living standard, I opinion that its positive sides are more than negative sides. If
people
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 organize their
time
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 properly and educate their children
then
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 they could lead a beautiful life.
Submitted by fatmaymc23 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • economic development
  • quality of life
  • infrastructure
  • healthcare
  • education
  • job opportunities
  • unemployment
  • poverty
  • technological advancements
  • innovation
  • traditional cultural values
  • social bonds
  • material wealth
  • consumerism
  • social inequality
  • environmental conservation
  • wealth gap
  • vulnerable groups
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