IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Universities should should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#universities #numbers #students
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Tertiary education should take the same proportions of male and female students in each subject. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 opinion because it reduces the
gender
Use synonyms
 gap at work and
both
Use synonyms
 genders are equally capable of learning. The
first
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 main reason why I agree that
universities
Use synonyms
 should take equal numbers of
males
Use synonyms
 and
females
Use synonyms
 is that it takes part in the reduction of the
gender
Use synonyms
 gap at work.
That is
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 to say that when
universities
Use synonyms
 produce equal numbers of professional
males
Use synonyms
 and
females
Use synonyms
 would result in an equal
gender
Use synonyms
 representation in the workforce.
For example
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, in Somalia,
universities
Use synonyms
 take an equal number of
males
Use synonyms
 and
females
Use synonyms
 in their health faculties for
gender
Use synonyms
 balance which has resulted in a
gender
Use synonyms
 balance in the workforce at hospitals. The
second
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 reason why I think that
universities
Use synonyms
 should accept a balanced number of
males
Use synonyms
 and
females
Use synonyms
 is that they are equally capable of learning.
That is
Linking Words
 to say,
both
Use synonyms
males
Use synonyms
 and
females
Use synonyms
 have the same abilities to learn and make their dreams come true,
therefore
Linking Words
,
universities
Use synonyms
 have to give equal opportunities to
both
Use synonyms
 genders to learn.
For instance
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, in Somalia, in previous years, there were a low number of girls who used to join the faculty of medicine, but these days more and more
females
Use synonyms
 are joining the faculty to show their abilities to learn. In conclusion, I completely agree that
universities
Use synonyms
 should accept equal numbers of
males
Use synonyms
 and
females
Use synonyms
 in each subject because it can lower the
gender
Use synonyms
 imbalance in the workforce and they are
both
Use synonyms
 equally capable.
Submitted by abdelhalimaboismail on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender diversity
  • fostering innovation
  • educational experience
  • enforcing gender quotas
  • merit and potential
  • individual achievements
  • natural differences
  • gender equality
  • reducing gender stereotypes
  • balanced workforce
  • traditionally male-dominated or female-dominated fields
  • fluctuating applicant numbers
  • compromise on quality
  • diversity aspects
What to do next:
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