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Band 4

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.

#countries #home #people
We are witnessing something that’s not that new to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
mankind. Many people would love to have some place of their own, as a
home
, to feel safe and secure and surely that desire hasn’t changed a lot
during
Change preposition
over
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 time.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
Correct article usage
the contrary
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contrary
Add a comma
,contrary
show examples
 there are people out there who strongly believe that quote which indicates that
home
 is a feeling,
home
 is where you are beside your loved ones and it’s definitely beyond a building. But the main question is, which notion is better? Is there a negative or a positive situation in
this
 case? As a person who
live
Replace the word
lives
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 in one of the
third world
Add a hyphen
third-world
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 countries, having a
home
by
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on
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 my own will give me the feeling of comfort and safeness without a doubt,
besides
, here, we consider it as a kind of investment, meaning you can live in it or you can put it on the market for sale or even rent, either
ways
Change to a singular noun
way
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 will give you benefits.
in
Change preposition
On
show examples
contrary
Correct article usage
the contrary
show examples
,
this
 feeling of attachment to a building, city or even a country, somehow will tie your hands and legs and sooner or later you will figure
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
out that you’ve wrapped yourself with invisible hokes and strings. You can not pursue your dreams, you can not live your life properly,
you
Correct word choice
and you
show examples
 may probably ignore all the opportunities one by one. To what? To the feeling of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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attachment to your house. So
with
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apply
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considering all these, situations like these
has
Change the verb form
have
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to
Correct your spelling
two
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 sides, like a coin, a win or a
lose
Replace the word
loose
show examples
 side. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
this
 depends on each person’s situation. In some places having a
home
 is a win and
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
 places could be a real loss!
Submitted by ahmedsabra150 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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