IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The best way to understand different cultures is by working at a multinational organization. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#cultures #organization
The most effective method to learn about different cultures is thought to be working for a multinational organization. In my opinion, I agree that
this
 method provides the opportunity to mix with
people
 from a variety of cultural backgrounds.
However
, I would argue that
this
 is not necessarily the best way to learn and understand other cultures. It is commonly believed that by mixing
people
 from different backgrounds one can learn about the customs and traditions of other countries.
However
, I believed that it is not necessarily the best method. The reason for
this
 is that depending on your position within the company, there is no guarantee that you will be the person who gets
such
 exposure to other cultures.
Also
, working for any corporation or organization, the management might impose the organizational culture on the employees.
Moreover
, there are a number of excellent ways to attain
such
 a goal.
For example
, by travelling around the world
people
 have the opportunity to meet
people
 from other countries.
Also
, in other
countries
Add a comma
,countries
show examples
 full immersion in a different culture can be achieved through participating in “homestays” by volunteer host families. Participating in these programs will not only help you practice their language but
also
 deepens your understanding of their culture. In conclusion,
although
 working in a multinational organization provides the opportunity for
people
 to meet others from different cultural backgrounds, I believe that it cannot be assumed as the best way as there are other options to achieve
this
 goal.
Submitted by aprilcondino on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: