Nowadays there is an increase in people with an unhealthy diet and not doing enough physical exercises. What do you think might be the reason? What can be done to encourage people to have a healthier lifestyle?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Over the past few decades, the world has evolved and changed substantially in many ways. Nowadays, rather than being physically responsible, people lead an unhealthy lifestyle by choosing junk food and no workouts. The underlying reasons involved in
this
case with plausible measures to force the population to lead a healthier lifestyle are analysed in the ensuing paragraphs.
Firstly
, the prime reason why certain demographics of society have an unhealthy
way
of living is that most of them are unaware of the detrimental effects of the
way
they live. To explain
further
,
although
people have a deep understanding of various matters
such
as science and mathematics, most of them do not realize the dangers of
taking
Verb problem
eating
show examples
an unhealthy diet and not doing regular exercise.
As a result
, individuals tend to consume a variety of consumables without being responsible for their bodies and induce impacts on themselves.
For instance
, today, a sheer number of workers prefer to dine in instant food outlets to save an enormous amount of time and effort, without being sceptical about the toxic ingredients manufacturers add to their products as preservatives and taste enhancement ingredients that are poisons to the human body. In short, the lack of awareness is the major cause of the rise in unhealthy ways of life.
On the other hand
, there is a feasible solution to encourage the community to have a healthier alternative.
That is
, to educate society from a school level about the potential damages of being irresponsible about their diet and exercise; children get used to better living from their childhood itself. To make it more clear, if educational institutions provide better knowledge regarding the ideal
way
of food consumption and physical exercise, they tend to follow it from an early stage.
Therefore
, in the future
Rephrase
apply
show examples
also
, they will stay on the same track, rather than skipping workouts and eating junk foods.
For instance
, in the UK from class one itself, the school curriculum includes a subject named diet and games which are mandatory.
As a result
, not only the students but
also
their parents have started adapting to a healthier
living
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
way
.
Overall
, educating the tribe with
legit
Correct word choice
legitimate
show examples
information is the key to attracting more to a healthier lifestyle.
To conclude
, increasing unscientific ways of living is an active problem because it induces impacts on people. Even though the challenges are improbable to be eradicated within a short span, there should be concrete measures like awareness to mitigate the detrimental effects of unhealthy living.
Submitted by rlnambiar98 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that the essay fully addresses all parts of the task question, provides a clear position, and supports it with relevant ideas and examples.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally clear, but there are areas where ideas could be more logically linked and transitions improved. Ensure that there is a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a fairly good range of vocabulary and language is generally used with sufficient flexibility and accuracy. However, there is a need for more variety and precision in word choice to enhance the overall lexical resource.
grammatical range
While grammatical structures are mostly accurate, there are instances of errors and lack of sentence variety. Aim to use a wide range of structures and demonstrate good control of grammar and punctuation throughout the essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: