Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measures

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Public

health

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is one of the apprehensive of today's societies. A group of

people

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believe that increasing

sports

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apparatus in public spaces can convince

people

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to exercise.

Although

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this

Linking Words

idea would be practical, In my perspective, just a limited per cent of the population encourage to play with cutting _edge play devices,

therefore

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, authorities must think about creating practical approaches to enhance public

health

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. In the essay,I will discuss both points of view. For a start, the primary solution

that is

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concerned can be to grow the number of

sports

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facilities in the city to invite the population to play. But it is inevitable there are many bugs in

this

Linking Words

plan.

For instance

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, it is unaffordable for all classes in public to pay for gyms expense,because of economic problems.

However

Linking Words

,for solving

this

Linking Words

tackle councils put

sports

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devices in the parks in the city,

therefore

Linking Words

,using them is free. But

also

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, they forget, that doing physical exercise with a compulsory hijab could be hard.

Then

Linking Words

, a large number of women cannot use facilities.

consequently

Linking Words

this

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approach cannot be the best way.

secondly

Linking Words

,authorities must be more creative,

for instance

Linking Words

,considering

health

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insurance would be a positive move for public

health

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.To illustrate , consider labour who cannot afford to pay his family’s remedy.

Therefore

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, they do not go to the hospital for treatment.so

this

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is a disaster for society because the patients will die and the population will decline gradually.But,if they use insurance ,they will go to the doctor every year for checkups, and

as a result

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this

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can decrease the rate of death.

In addition

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, governments can enforce schools to teach students about a healthy lifestyle from primary school,and

also

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Tv producers make Tv programs to the aware community of the effects of

sports

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and healthy nutrients in physics and spirit.The more a society is aware ,The more healthy public the community is. To sum up, giving the facilities to

people

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for encouraging them to healthy life would be efficient but not sufficient.In my view,increasing

people

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's acknowledgement of the side effects of unhealthy life can change society's minds.

Submitted by s.saravi2 on Sun Sep 18 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

336 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

public health
sports facilities
physical activity
exercise
chronic diseases
heart disease
obesity
inclusivity
participation
safe environment
social interaction
community engagement
comprehensive approach
health education programs
environmental factors
healthcare infrastructure
quality healthcare services
public health initiatives

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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

An organization has given an advertisement for a part-time job for local children. Write a letter to the administrator of the organization. In your letter Introduce yourself Why you think you are suitable for the job State when you will be able to join that job

Some people feel that boarding schools are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for a number of reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and reach a conclusion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building the live in. What are the reason for this? How can people research this?