IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Inspite of the advances made in agriculture , many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

#inspite #advances #agriculture #people #world #case
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Over the era, many advancements are implemented in the field of
agriculture
Use synonyms
, even though many
people
Use synonyms
 over the globe are starving.
This
Linking Words
 essay states that the problem is due to an increase in export rates and a
shortage
Use synonyms
 of
labour
Use synonyms
 and these can be solved by setting a limit to international trade and attracting more
people
Use synonyms
 to do farming.
Firstly
Linking Words
, exporting of local items is increased dramatically. Farmers are getting more selling value while they export the items aboard which
resulting
Wrong verb form
results
show examples
 in a
shortage
Use synonyms
 of local food in the local market.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
labour
Add an article
the labour
a labour
show examples
shortage
Use synonyms
 is one of the prominent reasons for
this
Linking Words
 cause. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there are lots of technological developments happening in
agriculture
Use synonyms
,
people
Use synonyms
 are not willing to do farming.
For instance
Linking Words
, a recent study shows that over the world there is a decrease of 35 per cent of
labour
Use synonyms
 in the
agriculture
Use synonyms
 industry. Imposing taxes on exported goods can be reduced overseas trade to some
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
.
Also
Linking Words
, the government can support the farmers by increasing the local selling price in the market.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, to attract more
people
Use synonyms
 to the agricultural industry, the government can adopt programmes like providing free crops
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and free land to the common
people
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, many cooperative banks are providing loans for
agriculture
Use synonyms
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
great support for the local
people
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the adversities like exports and
labour
Use synonyms
shortage
Use synonyms
 can reduce by raising the local sales price and encouraging
people
Use synonyms
 to
agriculture
Use synonyms
 will reduce hunger in many nations.
Submitted by chinjukoshy333 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: