In many parts of the world, children are given more freedom in the past. Is this a positive or a negative development?
Nowadays a lot is spoken about
child
rights. In fact, many parents across the world allow their young ones to be more independent, unlike in the past. In my opinion, the benefits of giving more freedom to children outweigh its disadvantages.
In the past, parents used to decide on behalf of their kids Use synonyms
Linking Words
due to
which the kids used to struggle Change preposition
apply
after
growing up. Change preposition
with after
On the contrary
, letting them Linking Words
take
their own decisions makes them more confident adults when they grow up. Correct your spelling
make
This
is mainly because they get to know about how things work at an early age which helps them to face complex situations later in life. Linking Words
For example
, a Linking Words
child
who gets to do the activities that he/she likes will definitely be more confident when he takes up a related profession. Use synonyms
Thus
, greater freedom in childhood is a positive development as it leads to highly confident adulthood.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, there are a few pitfalls to Linking Words
this
trend. If there is not enough parental supervision , a Linking Words
child
may get into wrongdoings which may lead to irreparable damage in some cases. To illustrate, parents today give mobile phones to minors Use synonyms
while
they are schooling, for their safety and to let them learn the ways in which the world operates. Since everything is available freely on the Internet, the good Linking Words
as well as
the bad, it may happen that they may get into bad company and Linking Words
consequently
, become victims of Linking Words
child
abuse or death. Use synonyms
For instance
, a few years ago, there was a game which Linking Words
lead
teenagers to take up their lives if they did not accomplish the game tasks and several cases of teen suicides were reported in the media. Wrong verb form
led
Hence
, it is extremely important that privileges be given under parental supervision.
To summarize, children today are more independent than the previous generation, which generates a great deal of confidence in themLinking Words
,
and helps them to do better in their lives. Remove the comma
apply
However
, I strongly think that Linking Words
along with
the greater deal of freedom granted to children, it is crucial that their actions are monitored by their elders Linking Words
such
that they do not fall into bad behaviours which can lead to harmful consequences later in life.Linking Words
Submitted by jai302 on
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task response
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and presents a well-structured argument. You have addressed the prompt effectively with relevant examples to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Overall, your essay is well-organized and shows coherence and cohesion. Your ideas are logically connected, and there is a clear introduction and conclusion. Ensure that the flow between paragraphs is smooth and that each paragraph progresses logically from the previous one.