IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Work
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 location has always been a controversial issue. Many
people
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 argue that highly educated professionals,
such
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 as doctors or lawyers, should
work
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 in the same
country
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 where they completed their internship,
while
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 others, including me, believe that
people
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 are free to
work
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 in any region they want.
This
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 essay will discuss why
this
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 debate exists and explain why I agree that individuals should be completely free to choose their
work
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 location. On the one hand,
people
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 should always be helpful to the
country
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 where they took their first steps. By getting a job in the same
country
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 that gave them the opportunity to develop their knowledge, fresh graduates can support the next generation by sharing their experience. They
also
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 contribute to the development of the
country
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 by helping to prevent brain drain.
For example
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,
last
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 year, around 3,000 Tunisian doctors who had completed their internships in Tunisia’s public hospitals decided to move abroad and take the opportunity to
work
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 in Germany, which is considered a major loss for their home
country
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.
On the other hand
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, in many cases, the hometown or the
country
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 where the training took place offers lower incomes for professionals compared to other regions. After many years of hard
work
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 and discipline, highly educated
people
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 naturally seek to improve their quality of life and that of their families by seizing opportunities in places where salaries are doubled, or even tripled in some cases.
For example
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,
while
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 a Tunisian doctor earns around 3,000 DT in Tunisia, the same person in France would receive approximately double that amount.
Therefore
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, the decision to leave often becomes a necessity rather than a choice. In conclusion, it is true that professionals should be grateful to the
country
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 that gave them their first opportunity.
However
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, I strongly believe that securing one’s personal and financial stability is sometimes more important, especially after years of effort and sacrifice.

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task
Add more clear ties to the task by restating the prompt and your view in a strong opening and closing paragraph.
coherence
Give more balance for each side and connect ideas with examples that link to the main point.
coherence
Use more linking words to show how ideas fit together.
language
Check grammar and word form to fix small errors and keep simple, correct language.
stance
Clear view on each side and your own opinion.
evidence
Good use of a real example (brain drain) to support points.
structure
Intro and conclusion frame the essay well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
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