Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #choices

It is argued that people have various opportunities in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

modern society. In my opinion, I partially agree with

this

statement since people in developed

countries

indeed have a range of choices.

However

this

situation might be slightly different in some developing

countries

. On the one hand, citizens in some developing

countries

are not able to share the same right

with

Change preposition

show examples

those in developed

countries

Firstly

, developing

countries

' residents confront

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strict policy as well as management from

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

, which

limit

Correct subject-verb agreement

limits

show examples

them in many ways.

For example

, in China, the visa for heading

Change preposition

to other

show examples

other country

Change the wording

another country

other countries

show examples

can not be approved if the purpose is unclear.

Secondly

, the

ages

Fix the agreement mistake

age

show examples

and

genders

Fix the agreement mistake

gender

show examples

can be the most prominent hinder when employees are searching

new

Change preposition

for new

show examples

jobs, while some companies have prejudices on these factors

tend

Correct word choice

and tend

show examples

to reject the applications. Yet these issues less happen in developed

countries

Finally

, some possibilities are hindered by the economic condition of families in developing

countries

since the government can't support them with financial

helps

Change the wording

help

bits of help

show examples

On the other hand

, concerning

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the improvement that the government worldwide are made, the situation become better, as more and more opportunities are offered by them. In developed

countries

, governments not only give financial support

for

Change preposition

show examples

their own citizens

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

offer

helps

Correct subject-verb agreement

help

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

those

live

Wrong verb form

living

show examples

oversea.

For instance

, they may give hands

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

students who have no capability on chasing their

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

due to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poverty.

Moreover

, not to mention that some developed

countries

highly welcome

Change preposition

apply

show examples

immigrants who live in negative environments. In conclusion, people are having more and more choices nowadays

comparing

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

with

Change preposition

show examples

the past, while some places still show the limitations of choosing freely.

Submitted by junnnhwang on Wed Sep 21 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

overwhelmed
decision fatigue
paralysis by analysis
consumerism
globalization
personal autonomy
market saturation
option overload
decision-making process
psychological well-being
buyer's remorse
customization
trade-offs
minimalism
information superhighway

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