Schools should only offer subjects that are beneficial to students’ future career success. Other subjects, such as music and sports, are not important. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People have different views on whether
students
should acquire particular knowledge in
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
for chasing their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
in the future. In my opinion, I completely disagree with
this
comment and in the following paragraphs, I would shed light on several reasons to support my stance. On the one hand,
students
going to
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
are not merely for the purpose of entering
workforce
Add an article
the workforce
show examples
.
First
and foremost, the courses which
seems
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
to have no relation to their future occupations are able to broaden
the
Change the word
their
show examples
horizons of them.
For example
,
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
taking
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
art class, which can improve their aesthetic, they might achieve the success of being an outstanding UI designer by merely learning the coding lesson.
In addition
, studying different lessons
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
actually
helping
Wrong verb form
helps
show examples
the
students
to realize what kind of fields
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
they keen to step in and choose
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
certain jobs from the bottom of their hearts.
Therefore
, diverse choices and possibilities are offered to them as they can search
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
most desirable occupation during the whole school time.
On the other hand
, the early choice of chasing
career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
path
Fix the agreement mistake
paths
show examples
in the salad days limits
the
Change the word
their
show examples
selections of them. Even though some subjects may be beneficial to their
career
success, they still
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
a range of possibilities which may discover afterwards.
For instance
, it is common worldwide that employees gradually find out they are not suitable for their current job and struggle to change to another area due to their lacking
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
some skills which are too late to learn.
Nevertheless
,
this
situation can cause various
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
of anxiety and have a negative impact on their own lives. In conclusion, though offering only subjects in schools is indeed an efficient way to help
students
achieving
Wrong verb form
achieve
show examples
their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
, I believe widely studies along with various advantages are able to
beneficial
Replace the word
benefit
show examples
to
students
not only in their
career
but
also
in their personal lives.
Submitted by junnnhwang on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: