Once children start school teachers have more influence than parents on their intellectual and social development. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#children #school #teachers #influence #parents #development

It is often thought that

teachers

have more impact on intellectual and social aspects of

student's

Fix the agreement mistake

students'

show examples

development as they begin

school

. I entirely agree with

this

notion as they spent quality

time

together at

school

as compared to their

home

. To commence with, the

first

supportive fact is that pupils spent more hours learning at

school

as compared to their parents at

home

. Because mentors teach them about every single detail of mathematics since their elementary level of education and

consequently

this

would grow their mental level as they learn different aspects of maths but on the other ,hand parents do not spend good

time

as they are always busy with their work at

home

For example

, a recent survey found that 56% of parents spent more

time

at work and were unable to provide attention to their kids.

Hence

teachers

have a huge part to sharpen the mental level of their students. The

second

reason why I believe that

teachers

have more role in student's life to play is that learners can get some breaks

time

in their

school

time

. In these spare times, their

teachers

can organise some extracurricular activities where students can get a chance to indulge in social activities.

Therefore

, social bonds with each and everyone could become stronger but at

home

, they can get a hard

time

doing any group activity because families are getting nuclear and their kids have no one to play with. In India,

for instance

, 67% are nuclear families and no one has

time

to spend with children.

As a result

teachers

school

only focus on enhancing social skills which would eventually help them to build social bonds with others. In conclusion,

school

children get more benefit from their

teachers

who teaches them socially and mentally. So I completely agree with the notion that students are more influenced by their

teachers

Submitted by Karamkv13 on Sat Sep 24 2022

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

311 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Once children start school teachers have more influence than parents on their intellectual and social development. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer and the poor are even getting poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?

Some people believe that the activities of large multinational corporations mostly benefit the economies of developing countries. Other people take the opposite view and feel that these large multinationals are generally harmful. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Some people think that the school children need to learn practical skills such as car maintenance or bank account management along with academic subjects at a school. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

The government should sometimes infringe on people's freedom for the security of society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangered species,while others believe that it is waste of money. What is your opinion?