Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others think they should only be allowed subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is sometimes argued that

students

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have to choose the

courses

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that are useful for the future and their work.

However

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, others assert that pupils should study everything they want and we should not limit them.

While

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I understand the importance of useful

courses

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such

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as science and technology, I firmly believe that

students

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in universities should take every course they prefer and we should not restrict them. On the one hand, many have the opinion that

instead

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of taking any

courses

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university

students

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, should only focus on crucial materials. Our life depends on technology,

thus

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, any breakthrough in technology or other vital fields like medicine can affect our daily routines directly.

For

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this

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reason, many people believe that we should focus more on these fields.

Also

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, in many situations, participating in numerous subjects at the same time can be a total waste of time.

Similarly

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, there are many

students

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who only concentrate on vital

courses

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thus

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, competing with them can be challenging for those who have a minimum knowledge of different skills.

On the other hand

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, it is perceived by some that there should not be any restrictions for university

students

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regarding taking

courses

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. I extremely believe in

this

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notion because of several reasons.

Firstly

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, life is not about being successful and making a huge income all the time.

For instance

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, my major is programming and I have been working on computers for almost 15 years.

However

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, I like to play guitar, paint, and other art activities, and I don't like to limit myself to computers and mathematics.

Secondly

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, focusing on a specific subject

such

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as mathematics, science, and physics can be overwhelming and devastating for

students

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For

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this

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reason, many prefer to choose non-related topics to give a break to themselves.

Lastly

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According to

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the research, if we choose different

courses

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as a student, not only we can improve our vocational and artistic skills, but

also

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it can be beneficial for our intellectual skills and mental health. In conclusion, people have different ideas towards the student's curriculum at university.

While

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I understand the importance of focusing only on subjects that are useful for the future, I firmly believe that

students

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should take any

courses

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they want and we should not limit them.

amir1375.6

Aug 5, 2024

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task achievement

Your introduction is clear and sets a good context for the discussion. However, try to make the thesis statement more concise and focused.

task achievement

In the body paragraphs, ensure that each point is elaborated with detailed examples and explanations. This will strengthen your argument and provide clarity to the reader.

coherence cohesion

Consider using transitional phrases more effectively to enhance the flow of the essay. This will improve the coherence and cohesion of your writing.

task achievement

The essay provides a balanced discussion of both views, which is crucial for a high band score.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clearly presented and relevant to the topic. The conclusion effectively sums up your opinion and main points.

task achievement

The essay includes relevant and specific examples that support the main points, making the arguments more convincing.

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

374 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

foster
engagement
excel
innovative contributions
diversity in research
well-rounded education
broad perspectives
critical thinking skills
mental well-being
burnout
forced academic paths
job-ready
skills shortages
tech-driven economy
employment rates
changing job market
utilitarian subjects
aptitudes
wasting talent

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