The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?

Online media platforms are places where information is transmitted to other citizens quickly, but they
also
pose a threat to human beings who use them.
Although
there will be undoubtedly some negative consequences of
this
trend, societies can take steps to mitigate these potential issues. Granted, there are a host of problems arising from
this
trend. The first issue is the addiction to using the internet. residents get caught up in social apps,
while
others are addicted to games and other things online. Those things happen that make the community unable to control their time and spend less time on their family or work.
Besides
that, the second trouble is online scan,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
is a phenomenon that gets attention every year. Criminals often use applications from the owner and steal identity, which can access much confidential information and lead to stealing money from bank cards. The
last
obstacle is cyberbullying which is more and more ubiquitous. Netizens often hear information from one side and
then
torture the other side with heavy and immoral phrases.
Furthermore
, overwhelming people can lead to mental disorders or even commit suicide. Notwithstanding the transparent problems mentioned above, there are many solutions that people could carry out to solve those issues. Encouraging people to participate in social activities, and creating great rewards as a motivation for them to engage, thereby motivating them to work together to fight against internet addiction.
Besides
, it is possible to affect them from the applications themselves, putting up ads for the bad conditions of network addiction, which negatively affects them psychologically. The second solution is to give examples of victims who have been scammed to warn individuals to be more vigilant and increase personal security to reduce the issue of being scammed online. The
last
solution is that the application can create features that limit offensive curses
such
as phrases that ridicule, insult others' identities or hurt them. We can't completely solve the words of netizens, but these solutions will limit some of the mental damage. In conclusion, everything in life has its pros and cons and the internet has its downsides, but we all have ways to deal with them in a positive way.
Submitted by vohoangthienan2610 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay has several issues with coherence and cohesion. The logical structure and the use of transitions need improvement to make the essay flow more smoothly. Additionally, the introduction and conclusion need to be more clearly presented to provide a better framework for the essay.
task achievement
The essay falls short in terms of task achievement. The response lacks clear and comprehensive ideas, and the supporting examples are not fully relevant to the topic. The essay should address the main problems associated with the internet in a more focused and relevant manner, and the solutions should be more appropriate to the issues presented.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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