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Writing Samples
Band 7

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing.Do u think the advantages of this development outwiegh the disadvantages?

#consequences #care #people #life #expectancy #development #outwiegh
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THE BENEFITS OF A GREAT HEALTH SYSTEM CAN NOT BE OVEREMPHASIZED. IN THE
LAST
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 HALF-DECADE, HEALTH CARE HAS DEVELOPED WHICH LED TO AN INCREASE IN EXPECTATIONS OF LIFE, AS WELL AS, LONG LIFE. IN
THIS
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 ESSAY, I WILL EXPLORE THE PROS AND CONS OF
THIS
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, AND
ALSO
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 IF THERE ARE MORE DRAWBACKS THAN BENEFITS. I WILL START BY LOOKING AT THE ADVANTAGES. THE OLDER
PEOPLE
Use synonyms
 ARE ABLE TO LIVE FOR YEARS, SOME EVEN UP TO 80 YEARS OR A CENTURY. THEY UTILISE THEIR OLD AGE TO SPEND TIME WITH THEIR FAMILIES AND BOND WITH THEIR GRANDKIDS.
ADDITIONALLY
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, THEY ENGAGE IN VOLUNTARY ACTIVITIES.
THIS
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 MEANS THAT THEY ENGAGE IN NON-CHARITY IN ORDER TO RENDER THEIR SERVICES TO THE PUBLIC. SOME
PEOPLE
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 BECOME HISTORICAL STORYTELLERS, WHO EDUCATE
PEOPLE
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 ABOUT THE CULTURE, TRADITIONS AND CUSTOMS THAT EXISTED. THEY BECOME REFERENCE POINTS, IN THE ASPECT OF HISTORY.
FOR INSTANCE
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, IN EDO STATE, THE CITIZENS VISIT OLD
PEOPLE
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 FROM THEIR REGION IN ORDER TO KNOW ABOUT THEIR TRADITIONS.
ON THE OTHER HAND
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, THE DOWNSIDE OF INVESTING IN THE MEDICAL SYSTEM IS THAT THE FUNDS USED, WOULD HAVE USEFUL IN DEVELOPING OTHER SECTORS
SUCH
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 AS ROAD INFRASTRUCTURE, WATER, ELECTRICITY ETC.
FURTHERMORE
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, HAVING TOO MANY ELDERLY CITIZENS WILL REQUIRE THE GOVERNMENT TO BUILD HOME FACILITIES IN ORDER TO ATTEND TO THEIR NEEDS.
FOR EXAMPLE
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, IN DUBAI, THE AUTHORITY BUILT A PROJECT THAT COST OVER $100 MILLION FOR AGED CITIZENS. IN CONCLUSION, WITH THE ADVANCEMENT OF HEALTH CARE,
PEOPLE
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 LIVE AND AGE LONGER.
HOWEVER
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, I BELIEVE THAT
THIS
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 TREND WILL AFFECT THE GOVERNMENT'S ANNUAL EXPENDITURE.
THAT IS
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 TO SAY, THE DISADVANTAGES OUTWEIGH THE BENEFITS OF MEDICAL IMPROVEMENT.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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