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Band 5

You eat in your college cafeteria everyday lunchtime. However, you think it needs some improvements.

#college #cafeteria #lunchtime #improvements
College is
a
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the
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bestest
Correct your spelling
best
 memory for
a
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the
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 young generation,
meanwhile
Add a comma
,meanwhile
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i
Change the capitalization
I
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 use to have my meal in a college canteen
everyday
Replace the word
every day
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in
Change preposition
apply
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a
Remove the article
apply
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lunchtime with my friends. In my inclination
cafeteria
 need some changes to facilitate
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
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 comfort level.
This
 essay
further
elaborate
Change the verb form
elaborates
show examples
 my view and
thus
 lead to a logical conclusion. Analyzing the statement and explaining
further
, the
first
 and foremost difficulties
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 faced on daily basis is that
campus
Correct article usage
the campus
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 canteen
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
don't
 have
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
proper seating
arrangments
Correct your spelling
arrangements
show examples
 which
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
everyone use eat their lunch standing only.
However
, space in a
cafeteria
 is less which arise a problem of a
conjusted
Correct your spelling
congested
conjured
 space.
Moreover
, lack of proper ventilation
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
 to humidity as well as
warm
Correct article usage
a warm
show examples
Correct your spelling
environment
environments
environement
Correct your spelling
environment
 in
canteen
Add an article
the canteen
show examples
. Probing ahead, improvement can be done by management in
such
a ways
Correct the article-noun agreement
a way
ways
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like
Change preposition
as
show examples
 taking
a
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apply
show examples
feedback
of
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from
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 each and every student so they can
analysis
Replace the word
analyse
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such
Add an article
the such
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 problem and mitigate it.
In addition
 to
this
, proper space should be provided there for
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
students.
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
Futhermore
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Furthermore
,
installation
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the installation
show examples
 of ventilators so it
decrease
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decreases
show examples
 humidity and
keep
Change the verb form
keeps
show examples
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 cool. Moving
further
, it is pertinent to mention that there should be
proper
Change the article
a proper
the proper
show examples
 number of seat arrangments so students can have their lunch.
For instance
,
survey
Add an article
a survey
show examples
 conducted by
times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 of globe mentioned that in china
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the governement
show examples
Correct your spelling
government
governement
Correct your spelling
government
 have proper rules and regulation for
cafeteria
Correct article usage
the cafeteria
show examples
 in a university that every student have to follow it
also
mantaine
Correct your spelling
maintained
maintains
 a
decoram
Correct your spelling
decorum
. To recapitulate, according to the
agrument
Correct your spelling
argument
 aforementioned above one
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 to
conclusion
Add an article
the conclusion
a conclusion
show examples
 that colleges should look after
educators
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educators'
educator's
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requirment
Correct your spelling
requirement
what
Change preposition
for what
show examples
 they need in
cafeteria
Add an article
the cafeteria
show examples
 and
impliment
Correct your spelling
implement
 it.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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