IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Universities should accept equal members of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#universities #members #students
In
contemporary
Correct article usage
the contemporary
show examples
 epoch,
equalities
Change the noun form
equality
show examples
 issues
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been
Add an article
a controversy
show examples
controversy
Replace the word
controversial
show examples
 for a long time, in
collages
Correct your spelling
colleges
show examples
, it is figured that the chefs should accept
this
 quality in all
projects
Change the noun form
project
show examples
 sectors irrespective what is the
gender
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
. I subscribe to the notion that
this
 law can be feasible and I shall discuss
impact
Add an article
the impact
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
equalities
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
on
course
Add an article
the course
show examples
 of action of institutes and analyse if
this
 issue is destroying the
principals
Correct your spelling
principles
show examples
. To commence with, team working
that is
 mixed by both genders plays a crucial role in practically
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
education systems.
First
 and foremost,
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 have mutual effects on each other’s creativity and
hard
Add a hyphen
hard-working
show examples
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
 or else and on in
another word
Fix the agreement mistake
other words
show examples
 they intense their capability.
Additionally
, the fills of abilities may
gape
Add a missing verb
be gape
show examples
 by their
gender
 associations.
Secondly
,
latent
Correct article usage
the latent
show examples
 sophistication of each
gender
 help to enhance science. To exemplify, it has proved that men are better at single task ordinated and women are better at analysing and multitasking works. As
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
 these facts create a window of opportunity for science.
On the other hand
, adhering to some projects may have
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
harmful effects on women. To illustrate, in civil engineering assessments
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been observed, physical
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 and overwhelming actions. In
such
 scenarios,
administration
Correct article usage
the administration
show examples
 cannot consider women and men
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
. To recapitulate briefly, in some parts there is an inevitable choice to separate them
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
Replace the word
various
show examples
vary
Correct your spelling
very
show examples
 tasks. To conclude, I do tend to agree with
gender
Correct article usage
the gender
show examples
 equality phenomenon in science activities.
Although
, there are cases that we cannot consider
them
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
 same and there is no room for doubt that conducting equalities will show us
charming
Correct article usage
a charming
show examples
 horizon.
Submitted by marzieh.kava on

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