As a result of electronic invention such as the computer and television, people do less physical activity, and this is having a negative effect on their health. To what extent so you agree or disagree?
There is no doubt that the electronic revolution makes pupils inactive and
cause
their health Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
be
affected. Add the particle
to be
However
, the
Correct article usage
apply
human’s
Change noun form
human
life
has been easier. Despite
, it is believed that our Correct pronoun usage
thisDespite
life
would have more issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
,
if we stood Remove the comma
apply
on
Change preposition
in
this
way.
In fact, the vast majority of crowds allege that our life
standard is becoming higher than before is
due to electronic devices. Unnecessary verb
apply
In addition
, vast
number of problems have been tackled by Change the article
a vast
the vast
this
. Despite
, it spoiled any chance of having Correct pronoun usage
thisDespite
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
life
. Furthermore
, the constructive criticism to
governmental dictation policies is due to plenty of individuals Change preposition
of
worry
about Wrong verb form
worrying
this
issue. For instance
, electronic devices and the internet make the
shopping easier, as going to stores is not needed anymore. Correct article usage
apply
Besides
, in this
situation
people have less activity in comparison Add a comma
,situation
of
before. On the other Change preposition
to
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
hands
people waste their spare time Add a comma
,hands
for
Change preposition
on
the
trivial tasks Correct article usage
apply
instead
.
Moreover
, the
daily activities have been decreasing over the past decade due to Correct article usage
apply
the
intellectual development. SoCorrect article usage
apply
that
, plenty of duties Correct word choice
apply
what
we have done by hand before we don’t do that Correct word choice
that
Correct your spelling
today
todays
because it is alleged that humans should Correct your spelling
today
Change the verb form
have
be have
more time for thought to expand their humanities Correct your spelling
behave
behavior
. Change the spelling
behaviour
Likewise
, the labors
disputes mention that humans should not work by hand and employees must make Change the noun form
labor
Add an article
a situation
situation
which in they do their less handy Fix the agreement mistake
situations
works
. Fix the agreement mistake
work
For example
, employers might well sit on their chair
Fix the agreement mistake
chairs
more
than eight hours per day without exercise. Whereas, they are working but they have any activities.
In Change preposition
for more
conclusions
, it seems that our healthy Fix the agreement mistake
conclusion
life
would be affected by this
issue and I allege that would be a quite huge problem in future.Submitted by ahad.dana on
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Your opinion
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