Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time using a smartphone. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #part #time #smartphone #development

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These days the majority of individuals depend on their mobile phones for the majority of their leisure

time

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. In my opinion,

this

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is negative development which is lead to heart disease, being overweight, less physical activity and

also

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problems in later life and altered life. One Serious problem that can arise from

people

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tends to keep in touch with others by sending messages on

smartphones

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As a result

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, residents have less face-to-face communication with their neighbours and friends even family members.

This

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means

smartphones

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can break down the connections of society in terms of degradation and obesity.

For instance

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, sitting two hours in front of the computer screen every day cause poor eyesight as well as brain dysfunction.

Also

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, I presume that

people

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who have eye-related diseases stem from seeing on the screen for a long

time

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besides

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people

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who have a sedentary lifestyle are prone to obesity. There are obvious reasons why individuals consider using a cell phone as the main way of entertainment and some services which mean shops, tickets for concerts and airports, as well as access to information on almost any subject are now available online.

Secondly

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, technology companies pay attention to entertainment which leads to the production of a large number of relaxed applicants that are available on

smartphones

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without paying the cost.

For example

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, in their spare

time

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people

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and teenagers can easily enjoy a favourite film or uptade news by accessing unlimited resources on the internet via mobile devices,

such

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smartphones

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, laptops and tablets. In Conclusion, there are some clear reasons explaining why

people

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tend to use mobile phones in their leisure

time

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. I believe that it is detrimental to health as well as the cause of obesity.

Submitted by wiseguy93 on Wed Oct 19 2022

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

screen time
digital addiction
instant gratification
multifunctional
connectivity
social networking
online services
self-expression
entertainment options
instant access
educational resources
communication tools
virtual interactions
distracted living
technological dependence

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Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time using a smartphone. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that the teenagers should concentrate all subjects at school. Others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject they are best at or they are most interested in. To what extend do you agree?

As countries develop, many people are able to purchase a car. Do you think that the advantages for the individual outweigh the disadvantages for the environment?

In the modern society, young people have a tendency of postponing their parenthood until late 30's or even early 40's. This essay shall deal with the reasons for this phenomenon and the effects this has on the families and societies.