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Band 4.5

Some people believe that we have nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #choices
Being provided with many options living in
this
last
 century is a blessing that human
beings
 need to be grateful
.
Change preposition
for.
show examples
This
 means that every single person in the world is given
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 freedom to opt
what
Change preposition
for what
show examples
 he
/
she would like to pursue and raise in
life
. A matter of living and figuring our
lives
 out
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 our own is discussed in the following essay. Right now, we as human
beings
 are provided with many chances, for
instances
Fix the agreement mistake
instance
show examples
, to select what
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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we want to do for
living
Add an article
a living
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, what
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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we want to study, whom
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
we want to spend our lifetimes, and where
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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we want to spark
joyful
Replace the word
joy
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.
This
 is a matter of people
Correct your spelling
themselves
theirselves
Correct your spelling
themselves
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acknowledge
Wrong verb form
acknowledging
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 what they want to have in their
lives
. Take a case
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
 we want to have as an example. In Asian
country
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countries
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 like Indonesia, there are a
lot
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oflot
show examples
 jobs that both men and women can select, based on their level of knowledge, skill, and interest.
Besides
, a matter of gender
also
 will not be problematic because women,
for example
, can be
technician
Fix the agreement mistake
technicians
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,
architecture
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architects
show examples
, or any professions that men were usually dominant in the fields.
This
 means that they can be in those professional jobs. Alternatively, even
we
Correct word choice
if we
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 are not in good situations or destiny, we still have chances to select what things are out of our prepared and planned goals.
For example
, we possibly have many failures in
life
,
such
 as being rejected
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
 reputable universities to study the most
favourable
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favorite
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 subjects there.
However
, we always have flexibility in terms of starting and selecting other preferences in
life
 that most people never consider
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
before. From the bottom line, enormous choices in
lives
 will always be provided if human
beings
 attempt to discover inside the earth.
Nonetheless
, not many choices, considered good opportunities, always come when human
beings
 really need them that much.
This
 usually occurs when we are merely urged not to select the most preferred options.
For instance
, a case of someone who has been trying in applying for scholarships for 20 years of his
/
her
life
 should not be applying
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
anymore.
A fact
Correct article usage
Fact
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 that he or she should not have spent
lives
for
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apply
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so long just
want
Wrong verb form
wanting
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 to study
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because the spent time
for
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apply
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waiting can be used for accomplishing what he
/
she really wants.
In other words
,
this
 case insists on someone
to select
Change the verb form
selecting
show examples
 the
last
 chance so that she directly finds other alternatives that may change the position he
/
she really wants.
This
 statement refers to believing and accepting that not everything in the world can be easily accessed and selected based on our
owns
Replace the word
own
show examples
. To sum up, we clearly can choose what things we want to have and reach in
lives
Correct pronoun usage
our lives
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, but we need to be sure that
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
 opportunities we witness in
this
 world will be easily acquired as our belongings.
Submitted by IELTS_8 on

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
What to do next:
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