Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Opinions differ on whether or not the
number
of sports
facilities
has a correlation with the improvement of public
health
. While some
people
think that it is the best way for making a healthy Society, orders think its effect is insignificant. I personally believe that increasing the
number
of sports
facilities
is not enough and other measures are required. On the one hand, since the majority of
people
do not spend enough time
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
exercising, the chances of having diseases or going over time.
This
is why some
people
say if enough
facilities
were accessible for everybody, the
number
of
people
who do physical activities on a regular basis would increase.
Subsequently
, they will have
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
improved general
health
.
Therefore
, if the majority of a country's population give the chance to exercise more, the public
health
of the country we eventually become better over time.
On the other hand
, there are many more reasons why a society might have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
poor public
health
. Many of these reasons are not because of
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of physical activity.
First
of all,
people
in many countries have unhealthy habits that put their
health
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
risk.
For example
,
for example
, unbalanced diets, smoking, and drinking alcohol. These habits are very common and lead to poor public
health
. In order to improve the situation, other measures need to be taken.
Moreover
, increasing the
number
of
facilities
does not necessarily lead to more physical activity.
This
is why the most important action that helps to improve
general
Add an article
the general
show examples
health
of
people
is informing them about the dangers of bad habits and making them realize how exercise benefits their
health
. In conclusion, while increasing the
number
of sports
facilities
can be a good way of improving public
health
, it is not the best way and more actions must be taken for
this
purpose.
Submitted by bayatz80 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
What to do next:
Look at other essays: