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Band 7.5

Individual greed and selfishness has been the basis of the modern society. Some people think that we must return to the older and more traditional values of respect for the family and the local community in order to create a better world to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#selfishness #basis #society #people #values #respect #community #world
Nowadays, lots of
people
 tend to care about things themselves. Some
people
 believe that traditional
society
 is better.
However
, whether or not to return to the older values of respect for the family and community is a controversial issue. I deeply disagree with
this
 idea. It is clear that in the current
society
 there is more activity than before. That means that, with improving technology, human life is better than before.
People
 who live in
this
world
 can feel more comfortable, safe, and happy.
For example
,
people
 can buy everything they want at home without going to the supermarket.
People
 can travel everywhere in one day.
People
 can
also
 make an appointment with a doctor via the internet.
Therefore
, nowadays, the
world
 that all of us live in is better than the old
society
. Maybe nobody wants to return to the old one.
Moreover
,
people
 need to take care of their own things.
such
 as jobs, the environment, and family. They are living in a competitive
world
, especially young
people
, who are under strong pressure.
This
 does not mean
people
 are greedy and selfish. Many
people
 like to deliver aid to others when they need help.
For instance
, after Japan's earthquake in 2011, many
people
 around the
world
 sent food to Japan. Traditional values show respect for the family and community, but too many rules mean
society
 cannot improve. In conclusion,
although
 the older and more traditional values have advantages, We should look forward and believe that with technology increasing and higher educational levels, the
world
 must be getting better and better.
Submitted by kevin. B on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • modern society
  • traditional values
  • familial bonds
  • community ties
  • collective well-being
  • individual gain
  • responsibility
  • care for others
  • neglect
  • isolation
  • honesty
  • respect
  • cooperation
  • individual greed
  • ethical conduct
  • social cohesion
  • crime rates
  • mental health
  • general happiness
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