Nowadays young people mostly learn by reading books or watching movies and TV shows ,rather than personal experience. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #books #movies #tv

Nowadays many parents tend to teach their children by reading books and watching movies, rather than real-life

experiences

. I have both sides of

this

viewpoint. Learning

Change preposition

through

show examples

real-life

experiences

is a good

way

which

lead

Change the verb form

leads

show examples

to many benefits I will mention in

this

essay. On the one hand, youngster today do not

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

solve their problem immediately, when they face

problem

Add an article

a problem

the problem

show examples

, they often ask their parents or friends for help and can not do it by themselves.

This

is a result

from

Change preposition

show examples

studying at school.

The

Correct article usage

show examples

number of teachers still teach their students in a traditional

way

. Students

just

Correct your spelling

must

show examples

have attention on

knowledge

Replace the word

knowing

show examples

what they learn from school.

For example

, if

youngster

Fix the agreement mistake

youngsters

show examples

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a problem, they just know one

way

to solve it. It may be right in

this

situation but in some

cases

Add a comma

,cases

show examples

this

solution does not suitable

In addition

, young people build their confidence and

independent

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independence

show examples

thanks to real-life

experiences

to deal with any problems. It creates their own thinking, own

Correct your spelling

opinions

opinitions

Correct your spelling

opinions

though

Correct your spelling

through

show examples

many different situations in social

On the other hand

, they can

also

learn by reading books or watching movies. They can see some situations which appear in some movies originate from daily life. They can learn and imitate

this

solution and use it in their own case. But they need to choose the best

way

and suitable with their solution. In conclusion, there are many ways for parents to educate children. But real-life

experiences

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

pretty good for many generations later.

This

take

Change the verb form

takes

show examples

young people today close to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

communication and

also

society.

Submitted by vy.tran.crkh on Wed Oct 26 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays young people mostly learn by reading books or watching movies and TV shows ,rather than personal experience. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that schoolchildren should do their class work individually. Other people believe that sometimes class works should be done in small groups. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Huyền