IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

In some countries, shopping online is replacing shopping at store. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#countries #store #development
Life tent to be changed at the highest speed rates. Based on contemporary societies' demands, shopping via websites become more popular. I personally believe,
this
 trend is a more effective way in terms of time and budget management. In
this
 essay, I will support my opinion with relevant examples.
To begin
 with, searching for items on the Internet helps people to compare things based on their quality and price.
As a result
, people can purchase more optimal for their commodities and order delivery to the indicated address.
For example
, when individuals visit stores, their search areas might be limited due to the factors like distance and time.
Moreover
,
this
 method might not be effective in accordance with their budget.
However
, in present days, it is possible to visit a variety of stores by clicking appropriate websites.
On the other hand
, it is very crucial to be more aware of data security. When we purchase online, we are filling forms with our personal information and bank account details. There is a high possibility of risks, that website might be hacked in the nearest future. For that reason, it is always important to be more selective about which online store is more advanced in terms of its security updates. In conclusion, nowadays progressive generations stepped forward by using modern technology for their basic needs, which helps them to be more selective and productive.
However
, in order to minimise some risks, societies should put some effort.
Submitted by khadija.agazade on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: