Violence in playgrounds is increasing. However, it is important that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In contemporary society,severity is rising in parks but it is necessary that

parents

Use synonyms

ought to inform their offspring not to react severely to bullies.Both factors will explain separately. One of the main reasons for violence increasing in playgrounds is that some

children

Use synonyms

are growing up in broken families.

This

Linking Words

is simply because it has become brutality.

In other words

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,owing to inadequate care,they are more likely to be violent against others.To exemplify my opinion,today,many

children

Use synonyms

are living in orphanages

hence

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they are deprived of their

parents

Use synonyms

' love due to

this

Linking Words

reason they have a tendency to be envious and brutal toward those who are living in happy families.

That is

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why the majority of violent behaviours reasons come from families.

However

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,it is crucial that

parents

Use synonyms

should teach their

children

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to avoid demonstrating misbehaving when they are exposed to violence.In order to realize it,

parents

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ought to keep under control their offspring to supervise and amend each attitude.

Moreover

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,they have a chance to make two ways to communicate with

school

Use synonyms

teachers to get information about

children

Use synonyms

school

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activities.It is the best way because when

children

Use synonyms

are at

school

Use synonyms

,it is impossible to follow them but

school

Use synonyms

authorities can help them.

Additionally

Linking Words

school

Use synonyms

teachers have a great liability to educate

children

Use synonyms

to show good treatment in playgrounds.One explanation for

this

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,in China,teenagers are taught by college authorities about how they can give a proper reaction when they are facing violence.They attend psychology lessons to overcome

this

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. To conclude,it is irrefutable that there is some evidence that a violent response to bullying is acceptable occasionally but the correct way is to choose a non-violent strategy.

Moreover

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,teachers and

parents

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have a tremendous impact on tackling

this

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issue.

malikli.malik1995Thu Oct 27 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

escalation of violence
peaceful conflict resolution
defuse tense situations
self-control
managing emotions
express themselves
resolve problems
foster a safer environment
lead by example
empathy and understanding
alternative strategies
life skills
retaliate
confrontation
non-violent communication

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Violence in playgrounds is increasing. However, it is important that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people are using credit cards or loans to run up huge personal debts that they may be unable to repay. It should therefore be made more difficult for the individuals to borrow large amounts of money. What are your opinions on this?

Deforestation caused by human activity is happening in many parts of the world, with serious results for the environment. What do you think can be done to solve this problem? Support your opinion with reasons and examples from your own knowledge and experience.

In today's world, many people own a smarrtphone.Do you think the advantages of using a smartphones outwiegh the disadvantages?

In companies’ promotions to high positions should be given to employees inside the company, not to someone from outside or new hiring. Do you agree or disagree?