These days, many people watch spors on TV. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
At present, a considerable number of
people
enjoy watching sports
events on TV
. In my opinion, I believe that watching sports
on TV
can bring about more problems for audiences compared to any advantages it might bring.
Admittedly, there are some basic benefits of watching sports
on TV
. Firstly
, people
can feel excited. In other words
, when people
watch sports
on TV
, they usually watch a match that they like with their family or friends. As a result
, this
will make them feel happy because they can sit together at the same time. Secondly
, when people
watch sports
on TV
, they can save their money. This
is because if they want to watch an actual match, they have to spend a lot of money not only for transportation but also
for tickets.
Nevertheless
, despite the advantages above, I believe people
who watch sports
on TV
could face serious drawbacks. One potentially dangerous problem is that they will perform badly at work or school. That is
to say, most sports
shows are late at night, and some people
spend long hours in front of the TV
without getting enough sleep. Hence
, when they go to work or school, they cannot focus and perform well. Another obvious issue is that people
will become lazy. This
is because they usually sit in front of the TV
for long hours without doing any physical activity. In some cases, they can gain weight easily.
To sum up
, I believe that when people
watch sports
on TV
, they will face many problems, such
as a lack of performance and lazinessSubmitted by s_syedy on
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task achievement
To improve task response, ensure that you fully address the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages in a balanced manner. Consider expanding your points on the benefits of watching sports on TV to offer a more comprehensive view.
task achievement
Work on developing your ideas further to make your arguments more persuasive. Include more detailed examples or evidence to back up your points. This will enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, use a wider range of linking phrases to seamlessly connect your ideas. Also, consider organizing your paragraphs more effectively to ensure that your essay flows smoothly from one idea to the next.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, aim to make your introduction more engaging by including a thesis statement that better outlines your stance and previewing the main points you will discuss.
coherence cohesion
When supporting your main points, elaborate on your examples by explaining how they specifically relate to the topic at hand. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more informative.